izmeina: A cute cartoon critter with a bag and a teapot on his head (teapot)
Oh well. Livejournal was fun while it lasted.

Now they have started an April Fools joke that is nowhere as funny as the one offered by the Ministry of Foreign Affairs

Had no idea until Dreamwidth started rejecting crossposts. Went over to the Dark Side for a peek at the problem and this ghastly pop up ticky box is there like some pesky padlock. No navigation of the site is possible, clicking on links to read comments or anything.
You now have to enter the URL to get to any pages now.

So so glad that I imported LJ to Dreamwidth a few months ago even if it did mean having several years worth of duplicate entries. Had tried to reverse and repeat the procedure several times over the years but always ended up with the double entries since 2009.

Now that particular door has been shut.


Gone are the days when introducing advertising to the service was only ever a sick April Fools joke.
Now they taunt us with legal gobbledygook

7.4 Please note that, User shall be subject to Article 10.2 of the Federal Act of the Russian Federation No. 149-ФЗ if more than three thousand Internet users access the Blog (the Blog’s page) within 24 hours.

Of course this translation of the user agreement is NOT legally binding
But this one is

7.4 Администрация обращает внимание Пользователя, что если доступ Блогу (странице Блога) составит более трех тысяч пользователей сети «Интернет» в течение суток, на Пользователя будут распространяться требования ст. 10.2 Федерального закона Российской Федерации № 149-ФЗ.

This Federal Act of the Russian Federation No. 149-ФЗ seems to appear suspiciously often and anything with Putin's paws on it, is probably going to be an exceedingly nasty piece of work

I guess that any post that becomes too popular too quickly arouses suspicion as a possible pretext for protest. Nothing like using the sledge hammer of the law to crack a nut.

Also strange is the apparent absence of any discussion of this stuff over on Livejournal. Maybe all the Drama Llamas are long gone because they used to go to war over mere trifles and now they are all missing in action.

But there are much more important things to worry about in Russia these days. If they are not meddling in elections or bombing Syria back to the stone age, then there are the attacks from countless enemies.

With so much FAKE news out and about these days, it is hard to know which bombings are committed by terrorists and which are False Flag Reichstag Fires.

We can only be sure of one thing.
When elephants fight, the grass gets trampled.
izmeina: (Big Bad Bill)
Izzie was out partying last night. Not the usual piss up in a booze bin but a more sedated sort of event - an auditorium in the State Library to be precise
The previous week the very same venue was host to a forensic pathologist turned anthropologist regaling the audience with appalling stories of death, decay and dissection in Ancient Egypt. A day in the life of an embalmer in a tent without air conditioning must have been rather nasty indeed. Guessing most of them did not live to a ripe old age. Next week will be a feast of Mummies in movies

But last night was dedicated to the upcoming federal election. It was a chance for the folks who are disenchanted with the Coke and Pepsi parties. That was a rather accurate description of the two main contenders.

The alternative drinks included rum provided by the Pirate Party. There was also the Wikileaks party which had an almost identical platform, the Australian Sex Party. Not sure what their drink of choice would be. The old vodka gobbling diehards of the Socialist Alliance were there and the last on the list was the good old fashioned Greens.

It was a very politically correct event so no fun stuff such as One Nation or Palmer’s United Party. There was certainly no Christian Lobbies or Family First would be senators invited to this event

The event was organized by the online activist group Get-up and they had a presenter who looked scarily like John Howard. Guessing that Howard Sattler declined this most desirable of duties due to having a hot date with his hairdresser

Every party speaker got a five minute speech to start followed by a Question and Answers session with replies limited to 30 seconds which turns out to be a lot longer than you would think

Spooks, spies and sex )
izmeina: (Crazy Cats)
Izzie was out partying last night. Not the usual piss up in a booze bin but a more sedated sort of event - an auditorium in the State Library to be precise
The previous week the very same venue was host to a forensic pathologist turned anthropologist regaling the audience with appalling stories of death, decay and dissection in Ancient Egypt. A day in the life of an embalmer in a tent without air conditioning must have been rather nasty indeed. Guessing most of them did not live to a ripe old age. Next week will be a feast of Mummies in movies

But last night was dedicated to the upcoming federal election. It was a chance for the folks who are disenchanted with the Coke and Pepsi parties. That was a rather accurate description of the two main contenders.

The alternative drinks included rum provided by the Pirate Party. There was also the Wikileaks party which had an almost identical platform, the Australian Sex Party. Not sure what their drink of choice would be. The old vodka gobbling diehards of the Socialist Alliance were there and the last on the list was the good old fashioned Greens.

It was a very politically correct event so no fun stuff such as One Nation or Palmer’s United Party. There was certainly no Christian Lobbies or Family First would be senators invited to this event

The event was organized by the online activist group Get-up and they had a presenter who looked scarily like John Howard. Guessing that Howard Sattler declined this most desirable of duties due to having a hot date with his hairdresser

Every party speaker got a five minute speech to start followed by a Question and Answers session with replies limited to 30 seconds which turns out to be a lot longer than you would think

Spooks, spies and sex )
izmeina: (Scabbers)
Snatched from New Matilda

(Enter Prime Minister John Howard)

Good evening everyone. It’s a pleasure to be here. I don’t usually come to protest meetings but I thought it would be a shame to miss the last one.

I’d like to congratulate the organisers for having the courage to invite me here tonight, and over the next few days, I’ll be popping round to people’s homes to thank them personally. (Pause) No, I won’t need the addresses.

I know there are many people here tonight who will be very angry with me, but that’s all right. Forthright disagreement with the government has been part of our past, is a part of our present and will be a part of our fondest memories in years to come.

There’s been so much hysteria about the proposed new Liquidation of Unpersons Act, that people aren’t paying enough attention to the new Industrial Relations laws, and so I better begin by outlining …

(mobile phone rings)

Hello. Oh really? Ah, well that sounds pretty compelling.

(closes mobile phone)

Look, I have just had word of a new terror threat.

Now this is a threat that’s been assessed as credible by the division of ASIO charged with keeping an eye on extreme Islam and also the Henry George League, and so it will be necessary to add a word or two to a couple of sentences, and a zero or two to a couple of numbers.

If this sort of redrafting goes on, well we’ll be at Kinko’s all night, but I think it’s vital to remember that we are involved in a war here.

This is a real war, not a metaphor, as some of you people seem to think. It’s like the War against Fascism, not the War against Problem Stains, if that needs to be spelt out.

It’s a War against Terror, a war in which we have already been attacked twice – once in 2002, and again three years later in 2005 – and so it is vital that we turn the whole country upside down to head off this relentless rain of triennial attacks.

While most Australians seem to understand this, many people here clearly don’t.

I understand this, Peter Beattie understands this, Steve Bracks understands this, Maurice Yae …, Maurice Iuam …, er, the New South Wales Premier understands this. Even Kim understands this, which is why he has demanded that a tracking-device be anally inserted into everyone with a tan, so that the SAS troops stationed in Seven-Elevens can keep an eye on them. That was his latest idea when I left home to come here, although he may have come up with a couple more since then.

We’ve had to act to prevent the victory of a number of dangerous and possibly deranged men — such as, for example, Kim. I don’t know about you but he scares the shit out of me.

Incidentally, this indicates very effectively the difference between our two parties. Whereas Labor will shamelessly use the politics of fear to create a climate of utter hysteria, the Coalition uses it to create an intense and focussed hatred of a racial minority, thus minimising disruption to the vast majority, and that is something that only really comes from long experience.

I hope that’s dealt with the terror laws. Turning now to Industrial …

(mobile phone rings)

Ohhhhh. ‘Scuse me. Hello. You’re the what? The Surveillance Unit with oversight of what? The Fabian Society! So why are you up this late?

Uh huh.

Thank you.

(closes mobile phone)

Well ladies and gentlemen, I don’t mean to frighten you but I have been briefed about intelligence relating to al-Qaeda’s development of a semtex-based, tuna-and-pilchards mash which would make a walking bomb out of 90 per cent of household cats, and, following the next Federal Budget, 65 per cent of old-age pension recipients.

It has to be understood that the public is demanding these laws.

We don’t make up scare stories about teenage girls hiding mouth explosives under their hijabs and driving Toyota Hiluxes into the side of Westfield Shoppingtown – people come to us demanding action once they read newspaper reports of those private briefings ASIO gives me.

We do not overturn 800-year-old legal safeguards lightly, but only after the most exhaustive consultation with the very best focus groups. Let me tell you the market research bill is even bigger than the Industrial Relations bill.

Our first concern is with anything that has even a remote chance of having a major impact on Australian society.

So the arts will be unaffected.

We want to live as a society that is free and vigorous, but which is never far away from its fridge magnet.

We should not let the terrorists win by scaring us away from record-breaking house auctions, or indeed any act of consumption. To do that would be to let the terrorists win. And if we let the terrorists win, then the terrorists have … won.

We believe in choice.

Do you choose to be a White Protestant with a million dollar mortgage you and your White Protestant spouse will spend the rest of your lives paying off? Or, would you like to go to Guantánamo Bay, via Baxter? The choice is yours. Don’t say we didn’t offer it.

Last year, we went to the Australian people with a campaign based on trust. Next time, I’m going to pretend to be a six foot Black woman just to see if I can sell that too.

We have been an independent nation for one century, Federated on the principles of peace, mutual respect and the fair-go.

And in this, our second century … we’re going to try something else.


(This is an edited version of a speech delivered by Max Gillies (as Prime Minister John Howard) at ‘SEDITION!’ at the Sydney Theatre, on 13 November 2005.)
izmeina: (Don't panic)
Izzie has snatched some tasty morsels from the uber-delightful Abolition of Liberty Bill in its original incarnation.

So let's see how easy it is to go straight to jail without passing GO and certainly not collecting our minimum monthly wage of 200 silver sickles.

In this section: (page 75)
13 seditious intention means an intention to effect any of the
14 following purposes:
15 (a) to bring the Sovereign into hatred or contempt;
16 (b) to urge disaffection against the following:
17 (i) the Constitution;
18 (ii) the Government of the Commonwealth;
19 (iii) either House of the Parliament;
20 (c) to urge another person to attempt, otherwise than by lawful
21 means, to procure a change to any matter established by law
22 in the Commonwealth;
23 (d) to promote feelings of ill-will or hostility between different
24 groups so as to threaten the peace, order and good
25 government of the Commonwealth.

So saying nasty things about the Rat gets this serpent in the slammer. Not too difficult at all now is it? Oh and 'lawful means' - if this bill serves as a sample of the sorts of laws we can expect - will be like the good old DDR where everything is Verboten even when it is officially allowed. So 23d and co can certainly be used to outlaw strikes as uppity workers are one thing guaranteed to upset the order and good government of the Big Commonwealth King of Rats. But let's not get bogged down in nitty gritty insignificant details. Time to move on.


Page 78
(7) A person commits an offence if:
4 (a) the person urges another person to engage in conduct; and
5 (b) the first-mentioned person intends the conduct to assist, by
6 any means whatever, an organisation or country; and
7 (c)

the organisation or country is:
8 (i) at war with the Commonwealth, whether or not the
9 existence of a state of war has been declared; and
10 (ii) specified by Proclamation made for the purpose of
11 paragraph 80.1(1)(e) to be an enemy at war with the
12 Commonwealth.
13 Penalty: Imprisonment for 7 years.

Oh. And here we have the Hicks Fix. The nearest thing we can get to The Sybil Trelawney School of Law where nothing has to be in writing. The poor suckers are supposed to guess - who the big bad enemies are because telling the common mob would be waaay too easy. Tea leaves anyone? Well. They haven't quite come out and said it but we all know that the Commonwealth King of Rats is most certainly at war with the unions and one mischevious minister Jon Stanhope. Izzie associates with one and admires the other. So will that get us 14 years. We are sure that Rats have no time for the wishy washy soft on terrorism option of concurrent sentencing.



Control orders
The obligations, prohibitions and restrictions that the Court may impose on the person by the control order are the following:
(a) a prohibition or restriction on the person being at specified 1 areas or places;
2 (b) a prohibition or restriction on the person leaving Australia;
3 (c) a requirement that the person remain at specified premises
4 between specified times each day, or on specified days;
5 (d) a requirement that the person wear a tracking device;
6 (e) a prohibition or restriction on the person communicating or
7 associating with specified individuals;
8 (f) a prohibition or restriction on the person accessing or using
9 specified forms of telecommunication or other technology
10 (including the Internet);
11 (g) a prohibition or restriction on the person possessing or using
12 specified articles or substances;
13 (h) a prohibition or restriction on the person carrying out
14 specified activities (including in respect of his or her work or
15 occupation);
16 (i) a requirement that the person report to specified persons at
17 specified times and places;
18 (j) a requirement that the person allow himself or herself to be
19 photographed;
20 (k) a requirement that the person allow his or her fingerprints to
21 be taken;
22 (l) if the person consents—a requirement that the person
23 participate in specified counselling or education
.24 (4) Subsection 102.8(4) applies to paragraph(3)(e) and the person’s
25 communication or association in the same way as that subsection
26 applies to section102.8 and a person’s association.

What! No internet porn! Oh and counselling and re-education - under the tutelage of dearest Dolores no doubt. Izzie can already see the quill of Doom as she squiggles "I must not tell lies"

Oh - and this delightful little snippet is especially for members of the Rodent's Inquisitorial Squad and assorted spooks. Oh and note - this is not arrest we are talking here but 'preventative detention' because the spooks were too incompetent to actually find any real incriminating evidence that would stand up before a REAL court.

(page 38/41)
@105.23 Use of force(1) An AFP member must not, in the course of taking a person into 19 custody or detaining a person under a preventative detention order,
20 use more force, or subject the person to greater indignity, than is
21 necessary and reasonable:
22 (a) to take the person into custody; or
23 (b) to prevent the escape of the person after being taken into
24 custody.
25 (2) An AFP member must not, in the course of taking a person into
26 custody or detaining a person under a preventative detention order:
27 (a) do anything that is likely to cause the death of, or grievous
28 bodily harm to, the person unless the AFP member believes
29 on reasonable grounds that doing that thing is necessary to
30 protect life or to prevent serious injury to another person
31 (including the AFP member); or
32 (b) if the person is attempting to escape being taken into custody
33 by fleeing—do such a thing unless:
34 (i) the AFP member believes on reasonable grounds that
35 doing that thing is necessary to protect life or to prevent
36 serious injury to another person (including the AFP
1 member); and
2 (ii) the person has, if practicable, been called on to
3 surrender and the AFP member believes on reasonable
4 grounds that the person cannot be apprehended in any
5 other manner.
6 (3) Subsection(2) does not limit subsection(1)

So poor Izzie tries to slink off into the darkness and gets shot in the fangs because the poor spook was convinced that her hiss was highly venomous. Most reasonable indeed we thinks. Yesss. *Looks up 'reasonable' in the Little Howard Dictionary*

Oh and in the unlikely event of Izzie escaping with no scales unharmed and then surreptitiously slinking into Cyberia (from where she has been banned of course) and informing her Ozzie associates of her awful fate, well then they too become nasty sneaky seditious criminals too. Evil beasties.
And if we don't escape but smuggle out owlseses to our friendseses, that too puts them in a bit of a pickle if they squeal. If you see something, say nothing.

105.38 Disclosure offences Page 53-54 (p49 of original)
18 (1) A person (the offender) commits an offence if:
19 (a) a person being detained under a preventative detention order
20 (the detainee) contacts the offender under section @105.34;
21 and
22 (b) the offender discloses to another person:
23 (i) the fact that a preventative detention order has been
24 made in relation to the detainee; or
25 (ii) the fact that the detainee is being detained under the
26 order; or
27 (iii) any information that the detainee gives the offender in
28 the course of the contact; and
29 (c) the disclosure occurs while the order is in force in relation to
30 the detainee; and
31 (d) the disclosure is not made for the purposes of:
32 (i) proceedings in a federal court for a remedy relating to
33 the preventative detention order or the treatment of the
34 person in connection with the order; or
35(ii) a complaint to the Commonwealth Ombudsman under
1 the under the Complaints (Australian Federal Police)
2 Act 1981 in relation to the preventative detention order
3 or the treatment of the person in connection with the
4 order.
5 Penalty: Imprisonment for 5 years.
6 (2) A person (the offender) commits an offence if:
7 (a) a person being detained under a preventative detention order
8 (the detainee) has contact with the offender under section
9 @105.36; and
10 (b) the offender discloses to another person:
11 (i) the fact that a preventative detention order has been
12 made in relation to the detainee; or
13 (ii) the fact that the detainee is being detained under the
14 order; or
15 (iii) any information that the detainee gives the offender in
16 the course of the contact; and
17 (c) the disclosure occurs while the order is in force in relation to
18 the detainee; and
19 (d) the disclosure is not made for the purposes of a complaint to
20 the Commonwealth Ombudsman under the under the
21 Complaints (Australian Federal Police) Act 1981 in relation
22 to the preventative detention order or the treatment of the
23 person in connection with the order.
24 Penalty: Imprisonment for 5 years.


25 (3) To avoid doubt, a person does not contravene subsection(2)
26 merely by letting another person contacted know that the detainee
27 is safe but is not able to be contacted for the time being.

Oh how touching and sweet. Such concern for serpent safety. Izzie is truly moved to tears.
izmeina: (Don't panic)
Izzie has been doing a lot of sneaking and thieving lately. Just found the cutest poster gallery from over at Abovetopsecret. So tasty that we had to click and snatch

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