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The End of Days
It's that time of year and a certain survey is doing the rounds again.
Should really do a separate one for the whole decade but that will take a bit more thinking and nostalgic indulgence
1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
Became an evil scheming landlady - just that word makes a serpent feel ten thousand years older.
Went totally insane and entered this year's Nanowrimo competition - for the uninitiated - the challenge is to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days completely from scratch
Also participated in a market research brainstorming session - had lots of fun and got paid for it. The serpent has not sold her soul - the subject was not cola or mars bars or horrid hummers or other such seriously unkosher stuff but the state museum.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
The 2009 score was 4/10 - most of these were on the 1001 list
The 101 List is the serpent version of New Year's resolutions. That ends in February so will need to make a new one starting in May. That will give a 3 month breather and time to think of things to add to a new list
Nano in November proved the power of audacious deadlines so might try the trick of 30 day spells dedicated to certain projects - gardening, decluttering etc
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
A pretty little cat who adopted the Lair as her unofficial home. At first there were three kittens but now two have mysteriously disappeared
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Well, it's part of the job description when working in a nursing home. Three beautiful souls come to mind - one of whom had only been there 6 months or so but had such a presence that everyone missed him after even such a short time.
Then there's others whose demise was nothing but a cause for celebration - not just for Izzie but a whole bunch of the other house elves. What a way to live your life that countless people (and not even particularly twisted malicious ones) are delighted when you die
5. What countries did you visit?
Bits of Cyberia but rather less than usual. This year has been distinguished by many frustrating experiences in that part of the planet - evictions, long lapses in the World Wide Waiting Lounge and more evil beachball parties than this serpent cares to remember
Also one itsie bit of Oz - Bridgetown - which is as gorgeous as ever. This year was particularly magical
6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
A decent boss with half a brain
7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
8th June 2009 - first day meeting the new boss - having been on holidays when she started. Overheard her telling one of the house elves to grow an extra pair of arms. She's just gotten nastier and snarkier since then but has also proved herself to be a malicious witless wonder as well
31st July - the end of an era - the sneaky evil goblins closed down the Light and Sound Discovery centre upstairs in the old lunatic asylum. It was an old fashioned collection of gramophones, old radios, televisions, type writers, light bulbs, kaleidescope and mirrors of all sorts - basically lots of old technology using light and sound
30 October to 2nd November The annual trip down south to Bridgetown which was especially gorgeous, magical and inspirational this time
6th November - the moment the Muse arrived after an uninspired first week of Nano.
9th November - a feast of nostalgia - not just the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall but also attended a Lloyd Cole concert. Disconcerting to be surrounded by all these ancient 40 somethings. ;)
30th December - the arrival of the Preciousss. Found it sitting at the bottom of the stairs
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
The November nano nuttiness. Decided to live dangerously with no plot and no plans of any kind except two days of brainstorming down in Bridgetown. Trains are especially good for such purposes
Also ticking off several months worth of procrastination projects in the last week of October - silly but long delayed things such as finally calling the plumber to fix a leak, finally working out how to use the phone that had been sitting in the too hard basket for nearly a year and had only two weeks left to the expiry date of the sim card and various bits of sewing and tidying up
9. What was your biggest failure?
Procrastinating on the Goblin job front. Graduated in Feb 2004 and still not even properly started looking for a paying job counting beans.
Putting up with shit from idiot bosses. Izzie really needs to learn to be more assertive
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
The Izzie eyes have been not quite the same since that damned flight to Amsterdam. A noticeably decreased ability to decipher small print which is becoming increasingly more obvious
A bit of an issue for a serpent obsessed with reading the ingredients on labels and the country of origin
11. What was the best thing you bought?
The eenie weenie eee Pc. A bit of a bummer for typing but good for surfing in Cyberia and there's so so much stuff on it - even a baby version of Stellarium and the whole Open Office thing and the uberspooky Dark Grimoire Tarot deck
The Big Mac is still in its box so it's too early to include it on the list
Books deserve a special category of their own - the top 3 being The Permaculture design manual for the ridiculous price of $5! It's more than $70 something on Amazon and one truly amazing unusual book - serious magic
Douglas Hofstadter's "Le Ton Beau de Marot" for a ridiculous $2 at a second hand book sale and "The Complete Idiots' Guide to Alchemy" although that should technically be counted as last year as it was 31st December 2008 the serpent snatched it in the annual 20% off sale
PS The amazing and very evil "48 Rules of Power" by Robert Greene. This was a ridiculous $2 but worth its weight in gold. And also good for a giggle.
12. Where did most of your money go?
The House goblins usually get 50% of the Izzie after tax income and this year was no exception. But with the arrival of the froggie tenants, now increased it to about 66% and the continuing addiction to weeds and seeds. This was the year of the Water works - not just a rainwater tank but 3 visits by the plumber - an old leaking loo, an ancient bathroom tap needed to be replaced and the most recent - a burst hot water pipe and possible damage to the gas water heater as a result
13. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The return of the Mad Monk, the bitchy bishops and evil Eric Abetz. The Australian Liberal Party is such a wonderful soap opera
Oh and the grand Nanowrimo adventure and a certain deck of tarot cards
14. What song will always remind you of 2009?
The Summoning of the Muse - Dead Can Dance
15. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or Sadder - about the same. Just emerged from a phase of murderous rage.
Older or wiser Both - we hope
Thinner or fatter? Fatter. Ask Petunia - that's the only bit of Izzie that she is capable of noticing
Richer or poorer? Richer - not only does the serpent have most of the stuff she needs but also most of what she wants. The rent from the two froggies in the house has made a huge difference even if most of it simply got added to the house repayments. It's meant keeping the evil plastic in the black to the tune of $500 for most of the year and being able to prepay the annual holiday and have emergency funds for most of the plumbing disasters
16. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Reading, gardening and decluttering
17. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Being cranky and neurotic. Trying to get out of the Hell Hole of Cyberia by keeping on digging instead of just switching off and tuning out. Being overenthusiastic when it comes to weed hunting - ie buying too many plants and then seeing rather more of the poor things dying than should be the case. Buying and planting anything but a cactus after October is just plain stupid
18. How will you be spending Christmas?
Was at the ma and pa's place. It was like visiting Beauty and the Beast
19. Did you fall in love in 2008?
What is love?
20. What was your favorite TV program?
Occasionally watched "Gardening Australia" but it's just not the same without Peter Cundall
21. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Heaps - well one in particular and she'll be making a guest appearance in next year's nano novel. Revenge is a dish best served cold
22. What was the best book you read?
Other than those previously mentioned - the standout books of the year are Ray Bradbury's "Fahrenheit 451" - now that's what we call real alchemy -not that pompous Paulo Coelho crap
Also the absolutely amazing Andrieh Vitimus' "Hands on Chaos Magic" (thanks to the Cat)
As well as Ray Bradbury - the other big serpent literary discovery is H P Lovecraft.
Seriously spooky in a subtle sort of way. And it was fascinating matching the Dark Grimoire tarot cards to the various stories. Still waiting for the mysterious woman in red to make an appearance.
23. What was your greatest musical discovery?
A nostalgia fest - mainly Dido and Lloyd Cole - but they don't really count as discoveries.
24. What did you want and get?
The Big Mac, "Hands on Chaos Magick" "The Dark Grimoire Tarot" and a big purple nano banner
25. What did you want and not get?
A boss with a conscience more concerned with giving a shit than covering her arse
The menopause
26. What was your favorite film of this year?
"Up" absolutely gorgeoussss and a real tear jerker. Also liked "The Half Blood Prince" especially Tom Riddle Junior and Big Bad Bella
27. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
It was much much better than last year. Visited the usual lunatic asylum before pottering off to Petunia's place for a piss up.
28. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A Boss Voodoo doll that really works when you stick pins in it or invent all sorts of evil torments
29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Fashion is an alien concept to this slobbish serpent. But we are rather partial to green hats.
30. What kept you sane?
Sane - Izzie sane? Never ever?
31. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Er. Izzie prefers politics - Hollywood for ugly people. Bill Leake and Michael Leunig we guess - two very wicked Oz cartoonists. But Bill Leake got badly injured when chasing parrots and has been missing in action for quite a while now
But actually finding sexy - got to share him with Petunia - gorgeous old Peter Cundall
Barack Obama is quite cute but just like our own Mandarin jargonaut - all talk and no action. But at least Obama is better looking and an inspiring speaker.
First prize will have to be for Alan Rickman in his Severus Snape incarnation
32. What political issue stirred you the most?
The green reuse and recycling policies of the Australian Liberal Party. Not even going to bother with the load of hot air that was that time wasting air miles guzzling conference in Copenhagen.
33. Who did you miss?
Three cuddly pumpkins at work and a certain Happy Buddha and friends. Only met them for a week but they've had an influence far beyond what they ever could have imagined. Izzie has never been so overdosed on charisma and Patronus power. As well as the most evil and brilliant battiness. We feel just so damned Dursleyish in comparison
PS - this is what we said in 2006 but another three years have gone by and still missing them so it's not really cheating to cut and paste.
And - you know - is awful to admit it but there's a rather large rat shaped space in this serpent's heart after all these years.
34. Who was the best new person you met?
The Frog in the house. Half the Izzie's age but got so many interests in common and share the same contempt for the mob in the office at work
35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009:
Blessed are those who expect nothing for they shall not be disappointed
Aside from several encounters with Dementors, most of the really awful days all had in common that they'd been the object of much anticipation and expectation. Most of the misery was due to sizzling hot or icky sticky weather which made original plans difficult or plain damned uncomfortable.
On the other hand, some days which carried no expectations at all turned out to be the most wonderful and memorable of all the year.
Also discovered just how true it is that all you really need to be happy is something to be enthusiastic about
And the other big one - never ever underestimate the power of a hairy scary deadline.
36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"Yes there are two roads you can go by but in the long run, there's still time to change the road you're on"
Should really do a separate one for the whole decade but that will take a bit more thinking and nostalgic indulgence
1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
Became an evil scheming landlady - just that word makes a serpent feel ten thousand years older.
Went totally insane and entered this year's Nanowrimo competition - for the uninitiated - the challenge is to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days completely from scratch
Also participated in a market research brainstorming session - had lots of fun and got paid for it. The serpent has not sold her soul - the subject was not cola or mars bars or horrid hummers or other such seriously unkosher stuff but the state museum.
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
The 2009 score was 4/10 - most of these were on the 1001 list
The 101 List is the serpent version of New Year's resolutions. That ends in February so will need to make a new one starting in May. That will give a 3 month breather and time to think of things to add to a new list
Nano in November proved the power of audacious deadlines so might try the trick of 30 day spells dedicated to certain projects - gardening, decluttering etc
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
A pretty little cat who adopted the Lair as her unofficial home. At first there were three kittens but now two have mysteriously disappeared
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Well, it's part of the job description when working in a nursing home. Three beautiful souls come to mind - one of whom had only been there 6 months or so but had such a presence that everyone missed him after even such a short time.
Then there's others whose demise was nothing but a cause for celebration - not just for Izzie but a whole bunch of the other house elves. What a way to live your life that countless people (and not even particularly twisted malicious ones) are delighted when you die
5. What countries did you visit?
Bits of Cyberia but rather less than usual. This year has been distinguished by many frustrating experiences in that part of the planet - evictions, long lapses in the World Wide Waiting Lounge and more evil beachball parties than this serpent cares to remember
Also one itsie bit of Oz - Bridgetown - which is as gorgeous as ever. This year was particularly magical
6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
A decent boss with half a brain
7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
8th June 2009 - first day meeting the new boss - having been on holidays when she started. Overheard her telling one of the house elves to grow an extra pair of arms. She's just gotten nastier and snarkier since then but has also proved herself to be a malicious witless wonder as well
31st July - the end of an era - the sneaky evil goblins closed down the Light and Sound Discovery centre upstairs in the old lunatic asylum. It was an old fashioned collection of gramophones, old radios, televisions, type writers, light bulbs, kaleidescope and mirrors of all sorts - basically lots of old technology using light and sound
30 October to 2nd November The annual trip down south to Bridgetown which was especially gorgeous, magical and inspirational this time
6th November - the moment the Muse arrived after an uninspired first week of Nano.
9th November - a feast of nostalgia - not just the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall but also attended a Lloyd Cole concert. Disconcerting to be surrounded by all these ancient 40 somethings. ;)
30th December - the arrival of the Preciousss. Found it sitting at the bottom of the stairs
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
The November nano nuttiness. Decided to live dangerously with no plot and no plans of any kind except two days of brainstorming down in Bridgetown. Trains are especially good for such purposes
Also ticking off several months worth of procrastination projects in the last week of October - silly but long delayed things such as finally calling the plumber to fix a leak, finally working out how to use the phone that had been sitting in the too hard basket for nearly a year and had only two weeks left to the expiry date of the sim card and various bits of sewing and tidying up
9. What was your biggest failure?
Procrastinating on the Goblin job front. Graduated in Feb 2004 and still not even properly started looking for a paying job counting beans.
Putting up with shit from idiot bosses. Izzie really needs to learn to be more assertive
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
The Izzie eyes have been not quite the same since that damned flight to Amsterdam. A noticeably decreased ability to decipher small print which is becoming increasingly more obvious
A bit of an issue for a serpent obsessed with reading the ingredients on labels and the country of origin
11. What was the best thing you bought?
The eenie weenie eee Pc. A bit of a bummer for typing but good for surfing in Cyberia and there's so so much stuff on it - even a baby version of Stellarium and the whole Open Office thing and the uberspooky Dark Grimoire Tarot deck
The Big Mac is still in its box so it's too early to include it on the list
Books deserve a special category of their own - the top 3 being The Permaculture design manual for the ridiculous price of $5! It's more than $70 something on Amazon and one truly amazing unusual book - serious magic
Douglas Hofstadter's "Le Ton Beau de Marot" for a ridiculous $2 at a second hand book sale and "The Complete Idiots' Guide to Alchemy" although that should technically be counted as last year as it was 31st December 2008 the serpent snatched it in the annual 20% off sale
PS The amazing and very evil "48 Rules of Power" by Robert Greene. This was a ridiculous $2 but worth its weight in gold. And also good for a giggle.
12. Where did most of your money go?
The House goblins usually get 50% of the Izzie after tax income and this year was no exception. But with the arrival of the froggie tenants, now increased it to about 66% and the continuing addiction to weeds and seeds. This was the year of the Water works - not just a rainwater tank but 3 visits by the plumber - an old leaking loo, an ancient bathroom tap needed to be replaced and the most recent - a burst hot water pipe and possible damage to the gas water heater as a result
13. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The return of the Mad Monk, the bitchy bishops and evil Eric Abetz. The Australian Liberal Party is such a wonderful soap opera
Oh and the grand Nanowrimo adventure and a certain deck of tarot cards
14. What song will always remind you of 2009?
The Summoning of the Muse - Dead Can Dance
15. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Happier or Sadder - about the same. Just emerged from a phase of murderous rage.
Older or wiser Both - we hope
Thinner or fatter? Fatter. Ask Petunia - that's the only bit of Izzie that she is capable of noticing
Richer or poorer? Richer - not only does the serpent have most of the stuff she needs but also most of what she wants. The rent from the two froggies in the house has made a huge difference even if most of it simply got added to the house repayments. It's meant keeping the evil plastic in the black to the tune of $500 for most of the year and being able to prepay the annual holiday and have emergency funds for most of the plumbing disasters
16. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Reading, gardening and decluttering
17. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Being cranky and neurotic. Trying to get out of the Hell Hole of Cyberia by keeping on digging instead of just switching off and tuning out. Being overenthusiastic when it comes to weed hunting - ie buying too many plants and then seeing rather more of the poor things dying than should be the case. Buying and planting anything but a cactus after October is just plain stupid
18. How will you be spending Christmas?
Was at the ma and pa's place. It was like visiting Beauty and the Beast
19. Did you fall in love in 2008?
What is love?
20. What was your favorite TV program?
Occasionally watched "Gardening Australia" but it's just not the same without Peter Cundall
21. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Heaps - well one in particular and she'll be making a guest appearance in next year's nano novel. Revenge is a dish best served cold
22. What was the best book you read?
Other than those previously mentioned - the standout books of the year are Ray Bradbury's "Fahrenheit 451" - now that's what we call real alchemy -not that pompous Paulo Coelho crap
Also the absolutely amazing Andrieh Vitimus' "Hands on Chaos Magic" (thanks to the Cat)
As well as Ray Bradbury - the other big serpent literary discovery is H P Lovecraft.
Seriously spooky in a subtle sort of way. And it was fascinating matching the Dark Grimoire tarot cards to the various stories. Still waiting for the mysterious woman in red to make an appearance.
23. What was your greatest musical discovery?
A nostalgia fest - mainly Dido and Lloyd Cole - but they don't really count as discoveries.
24. What did you want and get?
The Big Mac, "Hands on Chaos Magick" "The Dark Grimoire Tarot" and a big purple nano banner
25. What did you want and not get?
A boss with a conscience more concerned with giving a shit than covering her arse
The menopause
26. What was your favorite film of this year?
"Up" absolutely gorgeoussss and a real tear jerker. Also liked "The Half Blood Prince" especially Tom Riddle Junior and Big Bad Bella
27. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
It was much much better than last year. Visited the usual lunatic asylum before pottering off to Petunia's place for a piss up.
28. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A Boss Voodoo doll that really works when you stick pins in it or invent all sorts of evil torments
29. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
Fashion is an alien concept to this slobbish serpent. But we are rather partial to green hats.
30. What kept you sane?
Sane - Izzie sane? Never ever?
31. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Er. Izzie prefers politics - Hollywood for ugly people. Bill Leake and Michael Leunig we guess - two very wicked Oz cartoonists. But Bill Leake got badly injured when chasing parrots and has been missing in action for quite a while now
But actually finding sexy - got to share him with Petunia - gorgeous old Peter Cundall
Barack Obama is quite cute but just like our own Mandarin jargonaut - all talk and no action. But at least Obama is better looking and an inspiring speaker.
First prize will have to be for Alan Rickman in his Severus Snape incarnation
32. What political issue stirred you the most?
The green reuse and recycling policies of the Australian Liberal Party. Not even going to bother with the load of hot air that was that time wasting air miles guzzling conference in Copenhagen.
33. Who did you miss?
Three cuddly pumpkins at work and a certain Happy Buddha and friends. Only met them for a week but they've had an influence far beyond what they ever could have imagined. Izzie has never been so overdosed on charisma and Patronus power. As well as the most evil and brilliant battiness. We feel just so damned Dursleyish in comparison
PS - this is what we said in 2006 but another three years have gone by and still missing them so it's not really cheating to cut and paste.
And - you know - is awful to admit it but there's a rather large rat shaped space in this serpent's heart after all these years.
34. Who was the best new person you met?
The Frog in the house. Half the Izzie's age but got so many interests in common and share the same contempt for the mob in the office at work
35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009:
Blessed are those who expect nothing for they shall not be disappointed
Aside from several encounters with Dementors, most of the really awful days all had in common that they'd been the object of much anticipation and expectation. Most of the misery was due to sizzling hot or icky sticky weather which made original plans difficult or plain damned uncomfortable.
On the other hand, some days which carried no expectations at all turned out to be the most wonderful and memorable of all the year.
Also discovered just how true it is that all you really need to be happy is something to be enthusiastic about
And the other big one - never ever underestimate the power of a hairy scary deadline.
36. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
"Yes there are two roads you can go by but in the long run, there's still time to change the road you're on"