izmeina: a big eared American eagle listening to everything (conspiracy)
David Rowe needs to be declared a national treasure. So so glad to be able to get a daily fix of his genius over on Twitter. Especially the war on Goats. Frank from LJ land would not be amused.

Dropping by Cyberia for a quick peek. Spent pretty much the whole evening offline pottering around in the Lair and listening to strange tales on the radio about a new sort of life after death

Looking forward to a proper catch up tomorrow. So many interesting places and things this week.
izmeina: a wicked witch on her broomstick by moonlight (broomstick)
The serpent has an assortment of strange rituals. One of them is to create a 3 month, 1 year and 5 year plan to be rewritten and reviewed around the time of the equinoxes or solstices.
So it is not that long ago since the most recent revision and I sort of got tired of endlessly rewriting certain items on the agenda
The main offenders being the Teapot Tree, Scarecrows and Hexen Ecke in the garden along with the Design your Own tarot deck which has been on the long finger for a good five years or even more now.
But one item stood out as being especially pesky. Sorting out the serpent stash of books.

Part of the problem stems from the fact that books breed like rabbits while book shelves breed like pandas. Then there is the weekly shift at the op shop sorting, pricing and displaying books on the shelves and there are just so many tasty tempting morsels to drool over. It’s sort of like a boozer getting a job in the bottle shop.

So being October and Nanowrimo on the horizon and all that, figured it is time to finally make a start. The best strategy is to be a sneaky serpent in order to get past the inner beast who likes to sabotage everything
I had seen how successful the strategy was of spending just 20 minutes pruning the woollybush in the garden so adopted the same trick for the book shelves
Will pick just one book case and just one itsy bitty shelf to sort out.

There cannot be possibly any harm in that. And before you know it, by the end of the week the whole 5 shelves are done and the inner beast is still sleeping soundly and does not suspect a thing.

So this particular book case was the last to be added to the Lair way back in July 2014. In spite of having “4 new book cases” on the wish list each solstice and each equinox, nothing was happening.
The top shelf got devoted to goblins and their minions. The Wolf of Wall Street shared shelf space with Warren Buffett and the wonderful Freakonomics folks.
The new wave of Perestroika found more additions to the top shelf. Gina Rinehart, Warren Buffet, Vladimir Putin and He who must not be named all found a place there. Donald’s “Art of the Deal” shared a space with “Putin’s Russia” on the right and Hillary’s “Hard Choices” on the left.

But these accommodation arrangements proved rather unsatisfactory. It was bedlam on the book shelves. So Hillary moved downstairs to share space with Michael Moore and Joe Bageant’s “Rainbow Pie” and Donald kept his room mate Vlad but Alan Bond and Rupert Murdoch got added to his friend’s list. Art imitates life (Alan Bond is the Oz equivalent of The Donald - a con man to the bone and they even share a connection to the America’s Cup yacht race in common)
"Dial M for Murdoch" just has to be one of the best book titles ever.

So the first three shelves got devoted to Wall Street, Goblins and their minions and assorted current affairs and history stuff. Irshad Manji, Ayaan Hirsi Ali and an assortment of infidels, jihadists and spooks also got to share space with Hillary along with David Hicks and his tale of life in Gitmo. Come to think of it maybe I should move that big fat tome next to Don the Con.
It's sort of like sticking pins in voodoo dolls but replacing the dolls with books
The rest of the shelves got devoted to lots of books about science and gardening.

But the strangest thing of all, the simple act of getting started with the sorting unleashed the beady eye of the inner serpent

This time of year is the council rubbish collections known to cheapskate serpents as Vergemart
Around the corner and at the end of the street there appeared one big red book case and a chest of drawers made from real wood. Not the rubbish IKEA flat panel DIY chipboard shit.
Not having a car sort of sucks for occasions like this but did manage to get the cabinet back to the lair drawer by drawer and then finally the main frame itself

It is going to be resurrected as a big fat space for storing books and stuff only of course they will not be so handy and visible like with a proper book case
Unfortunately the red book case got a bit damaged while dragging it along the grass and will need a bit of tweaking and fixing so that it remains stable
Learned the lesson and was lots more careful when bringing the wood cabinet back to the Lair

Until the big red shelves are fixed, the pyramid of unsorted books will remain sitting on the floor of the spare room.
But it is so spooky to think how the inner serpent is on the look out all the time but the Izzie has been too slack and distracted to make the most of its magical powers

PS To honour the real Black Friday, went and signed up for William Perry's new course The Threat of Nuclear Terrorism
His recent online course about The Nuclear Brink was scary and fascinating and it finished well before the results of the 2016 US election. Shit has gotten a whole lot scarier and more real since then

Even scarier is the thought that this ancient serpent likely knows more about nuclear weapons than the present US president. Based solely on these recent courses and an obsession with the topic from 1982 to early 1990s or so.
Including merely knowing what the three legs of the US nuclear triad are which that FM dotard did not know last year during the campaign and most likely has not bothered his ignorant arrogant arse to learn since then.
izmeina: Strange Spiral Clock (Spiral)
This has been a strange time of late. There is always the present moment but the past looms larger than ever.
At the beginning of the year this Scrooge Serpent dusted off some old 2006 calendars and diaries to give them a new lease of life. Most of 2006 was rather mundane but September and October were the occasion for a grand European adventure. So since the calendar year is the same, been busy revisiting memories and quite surprised at how much is still there some 17 years on without needing any external prompts other than the day and date itself.
Wednesday 11th October 2006 I spent in the gorgeous town of Groningen in Holland. It is a university town and the inner circle of the city is pedestrian and bike only.

Then there is October from last year. Some of that would be best forgotten especially the infamous Access Hollywood tapes followed by a very bizarre press conference on the morning of the second US presidential debate on Sunday 9th October.
The Donald and minions had resurrected some women who dropped a few Bill Clinton bombshells.
I remember thinking that’s what you call Going Nuclear. If that’s how dirty Donald gets in his efforts to deflect from his own perversions and distract his rival, then he will do whatever it takes to destroy her.
Even the fact that Hillary had done her homework for the debates and he had not, could be turned into some accusation that she was cheating or taking drugs or whatever while he snorted and sniffed his cocaine addled brain off. (Of course the cocaine thing is pure serpent speculation but he certainly behaved as if he were taking some mind altering substance)

Goblins and House Elves )
izmeina: (Crazy Cats)
In USA they got the Pussy Grabber and now Down Under we got the Goat grabber.
This must be some inside joke that the serpent is not privy to but to see that sad lonely creature out there wandering in the wilderness is a most amusing spectacle indeed

Or maybe old Tony is truly as blind as a bat and has mistaken the furry creature for his Precious as he scurries madly away from Mount Doom

izmeina: a big eared American eagle listening to everything (big brother)

Is there no end to the madness?
When the USA sneezes, the world gets pneumonia.

Here some 12,000 miles or more from Nevada the national paper devoted the first 5 pages to the massacre in Las Vegas and the state paper devoted the front page and the next 11 to it.
A shooting with similar casualties in the much nearer Pakistan, Iraq or Afghanistan would barely make 3 lines tucked at the back in the world news.

So even aside from concern about the actual flesh and blood people who have been murdered in cold blood and the injured who may well be ruined from their hospital bills (and that's WITHOUT Mr Big Deal getting Trumpcare through Congress) you would think that the US Govt would care about the whole public relations spin thing
Trump is already a disaster for the US tourism industry. This sniper on steroids has surely just fired the last nail into the tourism coffin

So the shooter turns out to be a retired Goblin. He certainly set about his wicked work with meticulous dedication and attention to detail. Malevolence combined with competence is a truly frightening and dangerous thing.
Wondering if is ever possible to find a motive from some one who is now dead, did not seem to lurk on Facebook or Twitter and also seems to have left no "Woe is me" pity party manifesto like that Norwegian creep

It could be something so simple and pathetic as a desire to have his 15 minutes of fame. The very fact that the massacre is constantly referred to as the biggest mass shooting in modern US history is surely throwing down the gauntlet to some other guttersnipe to try gain its place in history by beating this ghastly record. Like this is nothing more than some first person shooter video game.

But if the murder of children cannot change the ways of a nation, then the mass murder of a bunch of folks having fun at a concert is unlikely to make much difference.

In any other sane country, the Nazi Rat Association would be banned as a terrorist organization but in the USA they own the system lock stock and barrel.

I have watched some of their creepy videos featuring one Dana Loesch. It took just a little while to realize that I was not watching The Onion. No one could fake such hate.

She is one soul sucking Dementor. The malevolence just oozes out of every pore

After all this doom and gloom, it seems almost self indulgent to be saddened at the untimely but non violent death of Tom Petty. Here's hoping that he will be remembered long after the gun toting goblin monster in the golden tower of Las Vegas
izmeina: Strange Spiral Clock (Spiral)
It's that time of the year. Time to dust off the cobwebs and get lots of items on the lists ticked off and completed because Nanowrimo is coming. Got to make way for 30 days of the squiggle blitz.

Figured it would be a good idea to get in the habit of squiggling 500 words per day every day for October simply to get into the routine. Because when the clock strikes midnight on Halloween it will need to be more like 2,000 words per day if I want to reach this year's ambitious target of 60,000 words.

This time last year had the inspired idea of adopting a certain orange monster as a main character. After all he was all over the news and was simply inescapable. It would be a chance to have a bit of fun with the flash in the pan. With a copy of one dark and evil tome gathering cobwebs in the Lair, it would provide perfect 'research' material and inspiration for "The Art of the Steal". After all, one of our local megalomaniac narcissists - one Tony Abbott had proved to be very inspiring story fuel back in 2013.
Power hungry monsters are always so much fun in fiction. And that is where they are best kept. On a very tight leash.

I had never in my worst nightmares ever imagined that the shelf life of the Dotard would have extended much longer than the first week of November 2016 and that his toxic tentacles would have such a long and poisonous reach all over the world. Even on this large island surrounded by big water. Ocean water! Tremendous amounts of water.

For many years this serpent has been fascinated by the insidious and corrupting influence of power on the souls of mere mortals. From innocent beginnings and made up tales like "Animal Farm" and "Antigone" to historical horrors such as Hitler, Stalin, Pol Pot and modern monsters like Putin and Rodrigo Duterte.
Had never ever imagined watching the train wreck in real time with no need for translations.

It really is like observing some mutant soul sucking vampire virus unleashed from its lab onto an unsuspecting world.
Last year before the Donald raised his smug ugly Grinch faced head, November's adventure was to be some ghoulish tale of goblins and monsters called The Meganomicon.
This year, the abandoned monstrous tome and its tales of the demented crawling Chaos will be resurrected as The MAGAnomicon

Enemies of the HAIR beware!
izmeina: (Noodles uber alles)

Izzie thinks we need to send this mob on a world tour.
I would love to see them do "The Star Spangled Banner" for the Superbowl
Wardrobe malfunctions galore

Now if the Donald went on the road, what should his band be called?

Donald and the Trumpettes?
The White Knights?
The Tweetles
The Trolling Drones
izmeina: Strange Spiral Clock (Time Turner)

Is the serpent hallucinating or is that Alice really Asbestos Julie?
izmeina: curly green leaf spiral (spiral)
September is one of the most beautiful months of the year here in Dursleyville. It’s real Goldilocks weather. Not too hot and not too cold but just right. An added attraction is the wildflowers and weeds blossoming everywhere and driving the birds and bees berserk with all the tasty nectar.

Green and Growing things )
izmeina: A cute cartoon critter with a bag and a teapot on his head (jolly swagman)

Two years as Top Dog and this is all Trumble has to show for it. Sharing a bed with Bananaby Joyce and pretending that there isn't really a certain third person in the marriage

What's the point of all those brains and eloquence when at heart Trumble is little more than a spineless blobfish who dreams of being an Irukandji when he grows up just like his 'joined at the hip' best mate Donald who really is the most toxic blob on the planet

izmeina: (circle serpent)
Izzie has been missing in Dreamwidth Land for so so long lately. Was almost time to send out a search party.
Both Daisy and Dudley have gone back home so slowly getting back to the usual routine. It was nice spending so much time over at Privet Drive but it all got too much for this introverted serpent and needed to escape and get away from it all now and again.

Aside from Dursleyish dramas, been distracted by the nightmare across the pond. It is like watching a train wreck and being unable to look away.
In fact, stalking and snarking the Donald on twitter was pretty much the only link to Cyberia over the last few months or so.
November is around the corner and it is time to get back in the habit of squiggling. The magic is gone. Totally uninspired lately and not even managing to do the usual 20 minutes here and there just dumping stuff from the green skull into the Pensieve. That could explain the current crazy distracted state of the serpent.
Too much stuff out there and no time to sort it all out and make sense of it all. So so needing to get back to to the rituals of squiggling just to preserve some semblance of serpent sanity.
Sensible sorts use cycling, walking or sport to let off steam. Then of course there’s art, music and other such creative activities. I guess it’s good to diversify. I have all those eggs in the word basket. Not so bad if I had not been neglecting it so much lately.

Maybe it is time to diversify. Doctor’s orders and all that but that is a tale for another day
As well as squiggling, also getting back into the routine of pottering around and doing stuff in the garden. The orange tree is having a second flush of flowers. That is the first time this has happened. Weather has been so weird in the last few years.

Was up in Kings Park today drooling over the wicked weeds. It is the height of the wildflower season here and for folks who cannot get out into the countryside, the botanical gardens at Kings Park are a perfect place to see them. The botanical gardens are well worthy of being on the bucket list of anyone who is nuts about weeds. Australia really does have so many amazing and interesting plants as well as cute and cuddly creatures.

The birds are squawking and the bees are buzzing. It is the most amazing time of year.
izmeina: (Preciousss)
Harry Butler would be proud of his protege David Rowe

Sure hope there's an American field guide in the works

*slinks back into dark serpent Lair*
izmeina: (circle serpent)
Just a quick squiggle to say that the serpent is alive and well but has been largely absent from Cyberia lately.
Daisy Dursley is visiting again and there are the online distractions of Duolingo, The Washington Post and a fascinating online course about fake news and the surveillance state. Pity that the main presenter has an uncanny resemblance to Rolf Harris but with a German accent. It just adds an air of extra creepiness to the whole thing

Also snaffled a copy from the library of "No place to hide" by Glenn Greenwald which is full of the juicy details of the whole Edward Snowden revelations of NSA snooping. It's scary enough that Obama's minions were gathering all those hay stacks of information but truly terrifying to imagine what Steven Bannon and Jared Kushner would do with such a gold mine.
It is a riveting story and offers an offline alternative to slinking about in Cyberia sniffing out Scary Mooch snippets and boy scouts drama. Still not yet read the infamous New Yorker interview and now it is truly most ancient FAKE NEWS

Did finish Camp Nanowrimo but set the bar ridiculously low this year at only 15,000 words instead of the usual 25,000. Mainly because once Daisy arrived 2 weeks ago there would be very little time for squiggling or doing much at all online. Got to make hay while the sun shines

Tomorrow I will be back to using the tweet stone instead of a proper keyboard Portkey to Cyberia so most unlikely to be catching up on comments and other folks posts any time soon. Still reading and keeping up but just not replying much lately
izmeina: Roz with clipboard from Monsters Inc (monsters inc)
You know things are sad when a serpent gets more satisfaction and fulfilment wiping windowsills and tabletops and mopping floors than pottering about and slinking in Cyberia
This has been the case for quite a while now but this week has gotten particularly crazy

Since last year now adopted a rather peculiar ritual to go along with the daily Scrooge routine
As well as writing down every single silver sickle spent during the day and on what and preferably in chronological order, I have also taken to using the appointment section of the old fashioned dead tree diary to list what I was doing at the assorted half hour intervals and adding a little grumpy or smily face to indicate how I felt at the time

Mundane musings, rantings and ramblings )
izmeina: a big eared American eagle listening to everything (echelon)
Been a strange week in Dursleyville. Lurked around the lair on my days off because it was too grey and rainy to do much else. Then there is a bit of decluttering and sorting to do to make the place look reasonably respectable for when the Izzie sister visits in a couple of weeks from now.
Thinking of her, could not help but be reminded of July 2014 when she came to visit. They had a choice of coming over here together or taking separate flights one week apart so that her husband wouldn’t use up so much of his annual leave. In the end, they chose to take the first flight and all come together which was just as well because the one they did not take never did make it to Kuala Lumpur and ended up in pieces somewhere in the Ukraine.

Of course for many people who took the flight on 17th July, there were also some who had been toying with a different date. The saddest case was the family where the parents stayed in Amsterdam for an extra week and the three children and their grandfather came back early so that they would be back for the new school term. They never did make it.

I cannot begin to imagine what it must be like for their surviving relatives to be watching the drama going on in Hamburg at the moment so close to the anniversary.
For me it is a giant stage where the players strut and do their stuff all in the pursuit of power, but for the Maslin family like the other 250 or so people on that flight, it is personal

Then there are other reasons for being curious about this particular G20 summit. Many years ago I was living on the outskirts of Hamburg as a sad house elf enslaved to a vile creature who I called Heil Hilde. A blond blue eyed Aryan bitch of bitches with an uncanny resemblance to one KerryAnne Conway and with an equally loose relationship with reality

But any grand plans of being glued to the screen to try figure out where the conferences are being held or to recognize landmarks or watch the hordes of zombies was quickly dashed by a very cranky, slow and sluggish Big Mac
This computer would now be regarded by the puffed up little popinjays in the Apple Store as ‘vintage’ as I got it in late 2009. Positively ancient.
It is very erratic and unpredictable. Some days things go smoothly and other times there are just endless spinning beachballs and it is a struggle to do anything. Typing feels like the keyboard is dripping in treacle as the time between hitting the letters and seeing them appear on the screen gets longer and longer until there is simply no point.
Tonight was one such night.

So I just had to go without. Because if Izzie wants pictures, it’s a poky little tweet stone phone, the Big Mac or nothing. Unlike most folks, there is no television in the house so all news and gossip has to be gotten online or from the radio
Did catch that the slimy Saudi Arabians trumped the Donald by snaffling the hotel room he wanted. That’s Schadenfreude on steroids. At least Merkel will not let him build one of his infernal towers in any German city. Some people at least still have standards

Dodgy Dinner guests at G20

Found the motherlode of crazy creepy political cartoons and it has been so annoying trying to share them on Twitter. Maybe just as well. Because if Don the Con could see all the vile ‘picture in the attic’ portraits that David Rowe does of him, he would not hesitate to nuke Australia back to the stone age
Especially since we have also been taking the piss with the Confessions of a CNN reporter

So much sleaze and such a struggle to share it

Must be off now. Got to get the latest gossip on Donald Trump’s performance appraisal
Let’s hope there are TAPES
izmeina: a big eared American eagle listening to everything (snoops)
Izzie has been a bad bad serpent
Already doing a proper online course for mundane muggle reasons but could not stay away from temptation
EdX sent the juiciest owl yesterday spruiking a course called Global Media, War, and Technology

About warfare in the age of Twitter and Facebook and how various states and non state entities are using Cyberia to wage war by other means
And looks like this whole drama is happening right now in real time as Crazy Kim from North Korea sends some pretty Independence Day fireworks in the general direction of the USA
That’s one big scary party they have going on over there

And once again David Rowe has added his wicked twisted spin
Sparks and Snarks - trigger warning NOT SAFE FOR SANITY )
izmeina: creepy spooky old house infested with crawling critters (Haunted house)
So today is the first day of Plastic Free July

One guaranteed way of having a plastic free day is to stay away from the shops. When it’s grey and miserable and raining cats and dogs all day then it is pretty easy to do
Bad bad Izzie stayed up late last night long after turning into a pumpkin while on the trail of other psycho crazy low IQ orange monsters. But most gossip was just teasers and tidbits although there were some juicy nuggets about Freaky Flynn
So with the rain and all, lurked in the serpent sack all morning listening to the rain and the radio and did not get up until after midday.
It was still raining but in between showers managed to plant the peach tree bought last week along with a few mulberry sticks

Mundane meanderings )
izmeina: Strange Spiral Clock (Spiral)
Here in Oz it is New Year's Eve for the goblins and bean counters.
For normal folks it is half time for the 2017 season

Izzie has a bunch of rituals for this time of year
One which I have broken big time and here's hoping that it does not bring bad luck
One Goblin rule is to always have the plastic fantastic in the black for the end of every month
And being the last day of the financial year it is especially important and auspicious
But the Izzie has been a bad serpent and tempted by too many toys and things and did not use any day this week to make a big fat deposit to get back in black for the big day.

July is Camp Nanowrimo time. Slacking off for a change and going for a pissy 15,000 words rather than the usual 25,000 because Daisy Dursley is coming back to visit in the middle of the month and there is also the minor matter of an online course related to getting a proper paid job
Volunteering is well and good but doesn't pay the rent. Well actually Izzie is very lucky and has no rent to worry about. Housing costs nowadays are mainly water, gas, council rates, insurance and a slush fund for maintenance expenses. It took years of living on the smell of an oily rag to get the mortgage goblins banished but it was so worth it in the end.

But one other annual ritual which usually has a very positive effect on the serpent bottom line is Plastic Free July where participants pledge not to use or purchase any SINGLE use disposable plastic for the whole month which includes the biggie which is the dreaded plastic shopping bags but also straws, anything packed in plastic and pretty much 3/4 of the aisles in any regular supermarket

The unintended side effect of being serious about this challenge means a huge increase in home cooking and using fresh and healthy ingredients because cheap and cheerful cheats like frozen pizzas, shop bought bread and even cheese become completely unkosher because they all come wrapped in single use plastic
There are still delicatessens where you can buy cheese cut off the block and wrapped in wax paper but they are few and far between. Even milk is nearly always sold in plastic cartons or bottles.

It's the perfect opportunity to kill two birds with the one stone. Firstly to save silver sickles on shopping and secondly to actually use up the pantry stash which is a result of the horrible habit of hoarding.

Tomorrow is a big sleep in and will use the opportunity to plant the peach tree bought last week along with a few succulents and to do a whole pile of pottering about in the Lair and the garden
Got to make the place all nice and pretty for Daisy's visit.

Must slink off now to Twitterland. There's juicy gossip brewing concerning the Freak Flynn and those 33,000 missing emails.
There'll be lots of fireworks for the 4th of July. Here's hoping they won't be of the nuclear variety. There's no low to which Don the Con will not go for a bit of deflection and distraction
izmeina: Roz with clipboard from Monsters Inc (monsters inc)
Was supposed to be writing about the entertaining evening last night with drinks and nibblies provided and the guest speaker Julia Gillard.

It really was the biggest John Curtin Memorial lecture ever. Probably bigger than that inauguration ;)
But Oz politics has become just so tame lately since there's much bigger fish across the pond.

Observing the effect that the Ring of Power has on normal folks is fascinating, but watching what it does to a being who was already a nasty nihilistic narcissistic swamp creature (and the hordes of minions) is simply riveting

It's like Animal Farm meets Lord of the Rings

It's funny to find that an ancient antipodean serpent was long lurking and sniffing out tasty Twitter gossip months ago and only now is The Washington Post on the trail of the juiciest morsels of all

Signed up to the evil internet tax dodging #AmazonWashingtonPost a month ago at a bargain basement price but still barely getting around to digging in the vaults for the stinkiest corpses.

Amy is making a list and checking it twice

Sad to say that it is all naughty and no nice

Now it's TIME for some real FAKE NEWS.

izmeina: a big eared American eagle listening to everything (echelon)
This place is supposed to be a Trump free zone but some fan art pictures are just too amusing for this serpent to keep all to herself

A lying vulture sitting on his ass would be a more appropriate description for such a grand swords and sandals epic

And anyway, since when do real lions consort with sneaky foxes? The inner Slytherin is disgusted already


izmeina: (Default)

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