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Snivelling Grubs and Mendacious Rats
Been a long long day. Was up around 5.30 in the morning in order to be ready in time for our usual Friday morning meeting. It was a cold and frosty morning and most tempting indeed to remain coiled up in the serpent basket. But there was the minor problem of being rostered on to chair the meeting - so not really a respectable option if we don't want to be seen as an unreliable fickle flaky fruitcake.
Not that long ago, the prospect of even speaking at a meeting would have the Izzie in goosebumps and queazy for a week - and now we hardly bat an eyelid. So so true that practice makes perfect.
Did wear the special pink cardigan reserved for such occasions but in spite of that - was a nice chairserpent.
One of the creature features called the Pertinent Question is where one person presents both sides of an issue and then the chairperson randomly calls people to answer.
When the critic was commenting on this section of the meeting, she mentioned the trick much beloved of politicians to answer the question that they wanted rather than the one that was actually asked (Iz has been accused of this on more than one occasion)
So so had a fit of the giggles at this. Could not help but think of yesterday pottering on the docks in the sunshine watching the sailing ship Gotheborg depart - 6 cannon salute and all while listening to Question Time on Reichstag Radio
The Rat who had been on a whirlwind world tour hobnobbing and brown nosing with his creepy friends in Washington and Texas and then inflicting the poor Canadians with his verminous presence had cut his trip short to be back in time for Thursday's Question Time. Iz suspects that the real reason is the lack of respect and royal welcome for his Royal Rattiness in the land of Emerald Serpents.
He was in Dublin and not only were his speaking venues poky and almost empty but around a quarter of the local TDs (Members of Parliament) boycotted his speech to the Irish Parliament. Not used to that sort of abuse is our beloved Rat.
It's not just the business of his support for the 2003 invasion of Iraq that had them up in arms but also his rather draconian Serf Choices industrial relations laws which came into effect just over two months ago.
The latest twist in this nasty saga is the sad story of Spotlight - a rather cheap and nasty retail store that sells fabric and crafts sort of stuff. New employees are being offered a basic rate of $$14.30 - two brass knuts more than the present $$14.28 but in return for this enormous increase in the basic wage, they would no longer receive higher hourly rates for evenings, weekends or public holidays and would no longer be entitled to any tea breaks. You don't sign you don't get the job. Simple really.
At Question Time - there was at least three questions on this very company directed at the Prime Mendacious. The first concerned a letter received by a Labour MP from one of these workers - a 57 year old claiming to be a life long Liberal voter who is now facing a loss of around $$90 a week under these new arrangements and feeling most mightily miffed and betrayed.
We will never know if she is real or not but the Rat's answer was a classic - basically along the lines that the new workplace reforms will create a stronger healthier economy and more jobs. Oh what a weasel.
Second attempt - when it was brought to his attention that the new rules at Spotlight fulfilled the so called minimum conditions of the new laws - of which there are only five - but totally excluded anything else including bonuses or extra pay for evenings or weekends - he said any previous conditions under the old system remained by default unless specifically excluded - never mind that the new contract did state specifically that the old conditions were null and void and he damned well knew it. He also adds later that if she (the aforementioned 57 year old) is not happy she can appeal to the new so called Fair Pay Commission (which he has stacked with a plague of his ratty friends)
Then we get to hear about high unemployment rates and low increases in real wages when Labour was in government and the immortal line "My guarantee is my record"
Another Labour MP tossed at the Rat - a quote that he had made back in August that if a worker loses public holidays under the new laws that they must be adequately compensated for such trade offs.
(Izzie remembers that the Rat had said on countless occasions that public holidays would still be safe)
Oh we had to give him big bad brownie points for this one - almost sneaking admiration. He declares that so many people state that he has said such and such about this and that, that it would be most unwise to assume that they have quoted him correctly and therefore has a policy of never answering such questions unless a transcript of his alleged words of wisdom is provided by the questioner. (Not to mention the sneaky trick of insulting her character and questioning her integrity while pretending to be ever so nice and reasonable)
Oh yesss. The evil genius of it all.
So far - 3 questions and no straight answers. But it gets better
A specific question about Spotlight workers no longer being entitled to toilet breaks or tea breaks after four hours at work - whether or not he thought this was fair turned into a warbling rant about waterfront reform, the 1996 workplace reforms which were supposed to bring the sky falling down and civil war on the city streets - but they didn't so there is no reason to believe the Opposition this time either (never mind that in 1996 the Rat did not have a majority in the Senate so the 1996 laws were a well and truly watered down version of the original)
Silly bugger forgot to repeat his other favorite mantra "The best form of welfare is a job" Left that one for his Minister of House Elf Relations we guess.
Yesss. One day we may live to see the momentous occasion that this snivelling grub actually answers the question that he is ASKED rather than the one that he wants to hear.
Izzie really was innocent and naive enough to believe that most of the more evil sorts of employers would hold off until at least after the 2007 election and that the sky would not fall in but rather there would be a slow corrosion of living standards and conditions. Never would have imagined that it would have taken less then 6 months (in some cases - one WEEK) to bring it on.
But he may have just this once bitten off more than he can chew. Scare tactics worked the last two times - 2001 - the invasion of hordes of baby eating illegal aliens from outer space and 2004 - the interest rates scare. Play on fear and the back pocket and the suckers will fall for it every time. But if your personal pay packet falls by $$90 per week while petrol is going up and housing is increasingly unaffordable - then a so called strong and healthy economy is bugger all consolation. And how can it be healthy when a lot more people will have a lot less disposable income and a lot more insecurity?
Well, at least the Irish and Canadians can see the Rat for the revolting veritably vile vermin that he truly is. Izzie was so so hoping that he would have taken a peek in Paris. There they would have dumped him in the Bastille and dusted off the Guillotine.
And that's this insidious Serpent's seditious hissings for the day.
(Slinks off to snatch the actual transcript of wicked weasliness)
Not that long ago, the prospect of even speaking at a meeting would have the Izzie in goosebumps and queazy for a week - and now we hardly bat an eyelid. So so true that practice makes perfect.
Did wear the special pink cardigan reserved for such occasions but in spite of that - was a nice chairserpent.
One of the creature features called the Pertinent Question is where one person presents both sides of an issue and then the chairperson randomly calls people to answer.
When the critic was commenting on this section of the meeting, she mentioned the trick much beloved of politicians to answer the question that they wanted rather than the one that was actually asked (Iz has been accused of this on more than one occasion)
So so had a fit of the giggles at this. Could not help but think of yesterday pottering on the docks in the sunshine watching the sailing ship Gotheborg depart - 6 cannon salute and all while listening to Question Time on Reichstag Radio
The Rat who had been on a whirlwind world tour hobnobbing and brown nosing with his creepy friends in Washington and Texas and then inflicting the poor Canadians with his verminous presence had cut his trip short to be back in time for Thursday's Question Time. Iz suspects that the real reason is the lack of respect and royal welcome for his Royal Rattiness in the land of Emerald Serpents.
He was in Dublin and not only were his speaking venues poky and almost empty but around a quarter of the local TDs (Members of Parliament) boycotted his speech to the Irish Parliament. Not used to that sort of abuse is our beloved Rat.
It's not just the business of his support for the 2003 invasion of Iraq that had them up in arms but also his rather draconian Serf Choices industrial relations laws which came into effect just over two months ago.
The latest twist in this nasty saga is the sad story of Spotlight - a rather cheap and nasty retail store that sells fabric and crafts sort of stuff. New employees are being offered a basic rate of $$14.30 - two brass knuts more than the present $$14.28 but in return for this enormous increase in the basic wage, they would no longer receive higher hourly rates for evenings, weekends or public holidays and would no longer be entitled to any tea breaks. You don't sign you don't get the job. Simple really.
At Question Time - there was at least three questions on this very company directed at the Prime Mendacious. The first concerned a letter received by a Labour MP from one of these workers - a 57 year old claiming to be a life long Liberal voter who is now facing a loss of around $$90 a week under these new arrangements and feeling most mightily miffed and betrayed.
We will never know if she is real or not but the Rat's answer was a classic - basically along the lines that the new workplace reforms will create a stronger healthier economy and more jobs. Oh what a weasel.
Second attempt - when it was brought to his attention that the new rules at Spotlight fulfilled the so called minimum conditions of the new laws - of which there are only five - but totally excluded anything else including bonuses or extra pay for evenings or weekends - he said any previous conditions under the old system remained by default unless specifically excluded - never mind that the new contract did state specifically that the old conditions were null and void and he damned well knew it. He also adds later that if she (the aforementioned 57 year old) is not happy she can appeal to the new so called Fair Pay Commission (which he has stacked with a plague of his ratty friends)
Then we get to hear about high unemployment rates and low increases in real wages when Labour was in government and the immortal line "My guarantee is my record"
Another Labour MP tossed at the Rat - a quote that he had made back in August that if a worker loses public holidays under the new laws that they must be adequately compensated for such trade offs.
(Izzie remembers that the Rat had said on countless occasions that public holidays would still be safe)
Oh we had to give him big bad brownie points for this one - almost sneaking admiration. He declares that so many people state that he has said such and such about this and that, that it would be most unwise to assume that they have quoted him correctly and therefore has a policy of never answering such questions unless a transcript of his alleged words of wisdom is provided by the questioner. (Not to mention the sneaky trick of insulting her character and questioning her integrity while pretending to be ever so nice and reasonable)
Oh yesss. The evil genius of it all.
So far - 3 questions and no straight answers. But it gets better
A specific question about Spotlight workers no longer being entitled to toilet breaks or tea breaks after four hours at work - whether or not he thought this was fair turned into a warbling rant about waterfront reform, the 1996 workplace reforms which were supposed to bring the sky falling down and civil war on the city streets - but they didn't so there is no reason to believe the Opposition this time either (never mind that in 1996 the Rat did not have a majority in the Senate so the 1996 laws were a well and truly watered down version of the original)
Silly bugger forgot to repeat his other favorite mantra "The best form of welfare is a job" Left that one for his Minister of House Elf Relations we guess.
Yesss. One day we may live to see the momentous occasion that this snivelling grub actually answers the question that he is ASKED rather than the one that he wants to hear.
Izzie really was innocent and naive enough to believe that most of the more evil sorts of employers would hold off until at least after the 2007 election and that the sky would not fall in but rather there would be a slow corrosion of living standards and conditions. Never would have imagined that it would have taken less then 6 months (in some cases - one WEEK) to bring it on.
But he may have just this once bitten off more than he can chew. Scare tactics worked the last two times - 2001 - the invasion of hordes of baby eating illegal aliens from outer space and 2004 - the interest rates scare. Play on fear and the back pocket and the suckers will fall for it every time. But if your personal pay packet falls by $$90 per week while petrol is going up and housing is increasingly unaffordable - then a so called strong and healthy economy is bugger all consolation. And how can it be healthy when a lot more people will have a lot less disposable income and a lot more insecurity?
Well, at least the Irish and Canadians can see the Rat for the revolting veritably vile vermin that he truly is. Izzie was so so hoping that he would have taken a peek in Paris. There they would have dumped him in the Bastille and dusted off the Guillotine.
And that's this insidious Serpent's seditious hissings for the day.
(Slinks off to snatch the actual transcript of wicked weasliness)