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The Izzie Christmas Gift List
19/12/2003 09:01 pmGreenest Greetings.
Auntie Scrooge has been squandering the silver sickles on her nearest and dearest and this is what she has bought so far.
John Howard
A one way trip on a sheep ship to Nauru with stopovers in Afghanistan, Guantanamo Bay and Iraq. This package includes an all expenses paid stay at the Detention centre built for nasty sneaky queue jumping illegal aliens just like him.
George W Bush
Another ticket on that ship. He can share a stall with Johnny. And also a very large sack of depleted uranium shells for the toxic Texan. I mean we can't just let the Iraqis get all the good stuff. Izzie is extra generous and is including a bonus of 1000 Enron shares.
Donald Rumsfeld
A life size version of that famous photo taken just over twenty years ago that we have dusted off and taken out of the attic. Lest he forgets
Saddam Hussein
A big squishy cuddly Dementor to keep him company in his lonely little prison cell
Islam Karimov
A decent supply of razor blades and some Mars bars so that he can look respectable when he comes out of his hidey hole ten years from now when the West finally realizes what a naughty nasty boy he really is.
Professor Prufrock
A copy of the Koran especially signed and dedicated to him by Mohammed Mahathir. A life membership of the "Teachers for temperance" Society
Mamaslyth
An autographed collection of the complete works of James Redfield and an annual subscription for "The Watchtower"
Cat Irix
Bill Gates's personal and private CD with Windows XP
Niche Eenhorn
A very large squishy bag of BALLOONS
Now let's see. That leaves Andrie, Nevvie, Sara and Tony Blair. Some people are just a bit hard to please. Oh do let ickle Izzie know if she has forgotten you.
Oh and can anyone tell this curious serpent which day the solstice is this year and how do they choose the date for Chanukah. Is it also related to the solstice?
Auntie Scrooge has been squandering the silver sickles on her nearest and dearest and this is what she has bought so far.
John Howard
A one way trip on a sheep ship to Nauru with stopovers in Afghanistan, Guantanamo Bay and Iraq. This package includes an all expenses paid stay at the Detention centre built for nasty sneaky queue jumping illegal aliens just like him.
George W Bush
Another ticket on that ship. He can share a stall with Johnny. And also a very large sack of depleted uranium shells for the toxic Texan. I mean we can't just let the Iraqis get all the good stuff. Izzie is extra generous and is including a bonus of 1000 Enron shares.
Donald Rumsfeld
A life size version of that famous photo taken just over twenty years ago that we have dusted off and taken out of the attic. Lest he forgets
Saddam Hussein
A big squishy cuddly Dementor to keep him company in his lonely little prison cell
Islam Karimov
A decent supply of razor blades and some Mars bars so that he can look respectable when he comes out of his hidey hole ten years from now when the West finally realizes what a naughty nasty boy he really is.
Professor Prufrock
A copy of the Koran especially signed and dedicated to him by Mohammed Mahathir. A life membership of the "Teachers for temperance" Society
Mamaslyth
An autographed collection of the complete works of James Redfield and an annual subscription for "The Watchtower"
Cat Irix
Bill Gates's personal and private CD with Windows XP
Niche Eenhorn
A very large squishy bag of BALLOONS
Now let's see. That leaves Andrie, Nevvie, Sara and Tony Blair. Some people are just a bit hard to please. Oh do let ickle Izzie know if she has forgotten you.
Oh and can anyone tell this curious serpent which day the solstice is this year and how do they choose the date for Chanukah. Is it also related to the solstice?
