The Lair of the Emerald Serpent

Two weeks of the serpent holidays gone and it's been an unmitigated stuff up and waste of precious long service leave.

Spent the first week being brain dead and totally neurotic as well as extremely tired a lot of the time. There's probably a connection there somewhere
Tuesday was looking up. The hot humid sticky weather had cleared and it was a fresh, bright and breezy day. Got up feeling all happy and cheerful, looking forward to the day and not the least bit neurotic or miserable
But it did not take long for a return to the scheduled programming. Started with the bus ride from hell. The new buses are like bucking broncos at a rodeo - especially at traffic lights or basically at any time the driver uses the breaks. Used to think that it was because all the drivers were grumpy jerks but soon noticed that an unusually high percentage of these gas buses were truly awful but not the old ones
The long and the short of it was getting to our destination feeling like the old grey cells had been used as a punching bag or that the bus was on a gravity defying mission from NASA

Should have stuck to the original plan of using the two hours on the ticket to go straight to the university to spend the whole afternoon there before going to a public lecture at 6pm. It's a gorgeous place and with lovely lush gardens and cafes nearby. But that was too reasonable and logical. The idiotic inner beast decided instead to stay in the city, go to a cafe there and get some Happy Hour sushi before catching the bus shortly after 5pm.
After nearly 30 mins on another gas bus stuck in a traffic jam, was well and truly neurotic and agitated when finally making it to the lecture theatre 5 mins before the start of the talk

Wednesday was a much better day. Was feeling quite content and creative and spent a good two hours in a gorgeous quirky cafe with a beautiful garden, coffee and cake for $5, loos and lots of newspapers and magazines. And even free wireless internet. And bestest of all, there must be some magical child repellent force field around the place. There's never any squealing kids there at all, well at least not when Izzie goes lurking there

Friday was another visit to Sculpture by the Sea at the beach. Was back to the crazy old cranky self. Was planning our return visit today for the equinox sunset.
Yesss. The gods laugh when serpents make plans
But the big highlight of the holidays was to be yesterday's annual medieval festival in the city which has not been held for various reasons since 2007
Was thinking that it would be so so nice for a change to be able to spend most of the day there and even dress up for the occasion instead of having to rush off around 1pm in order to catch the bus to work


The grand plan was to stay there until 3pm and then get the train to Subiaco - an old suburb with weekend markets and lots of coffee shops and not too far out of town.
Slinked around in some very pretty gardens on the way down to the medieval fair. Went for a drink at one of the water fountains. Tripped on the corner where the grass meets the paved slabs surrounding the fountain and the next thing the clumsy serpent is on the ground with a sprained ankle
Hobbled down to the festival anyway and ended up spending most of the day having to sit on park benches and watching most of the duelling and sword fights from a distance. Lucky that we had a juicy copy of creepy Lovecraft tales on hand and figured that starting the one partly set in Western Australia might be an appropriate one.
The old foot was not really hurting while sitting down but was a right royal pain when trying to walk.
Did manage to get a peek at some of the chain mail, swords and spinning. Some clever creatures were using a stick with a CD on the end saying that it is just the perfect weight and size. The more conventional old wooden spindles were there too
There were lots of jesters, mad monks, The Grim Reaper and other assorted crazy people. It was almost like a tarot deck come to life.
Did find the stall from 3 years ago with very beautiful journals made with embossed leather and handmade paper. Most have Celtic Crosses, spirals and old interlaced Moroccan style patterns on the cover. With the criss cross stitching on the spine, they look they would make a perfect Dark Grimoire.
And then across from their stall was the very tempting Halycon mob with their exquisite silk and embossed papers, beads and broaches. The beads were the big thing on the day because a lot of these medievalists make their own costumes.
So all this beautiful paper and ribbons, it's time to finally get started on some book binding and decorating. And some seriously twisted scrap booking

In the end, came across the St John Ambulance first aid station and they put an ice pack on it and wrapped it in a bandage.
After a coffee, then hobbled off to get the bus to Petunia's place. Was half expecting countless lectures on how this wouldn't have happened if you weren't so big, fat and clumsy etc etc
She did mention the F word once but did not harp on and on and on about it

Funny. Got to thinking - it was pretty annoying being stuck most of the day sitting on a park bench watching the world go by and having to forget about today's plans of visiting the beach for the sunset. Turned out all cloudy in the end
But actually enjoyed yesterday more than last Saturday when the legs were perfectly functional but the old grey cells were all haywire.
That's one thing you can say about physical pain - it forces your mind to remain more in the present instead of constantly running off all over the place awfulizing

It's just such a bummer that it happens in the middle of our holidays. Will be back at work on Saturday so will most likely be better by then
Izzie's got 20 zillion unused sickies but ends up twisting her ankle in the middle of some very precious long service leave
Maybe it's a message from the gods to stop being such a bag lady and carrying around too many things. Was beginning to suspect that maybe all the things in the back pack plus all those excess kilos of blubber is what's really making the Izzie all tired and cranky
Time to be like the pink and fluffy bimbos and carry nothing that cannot fit in a black handbag

So that's the gossip from Grannie Izzie. Now it's time to hobble down the stairs to watch V and to hope that tonight's episode is the one where Diana the Leader indulges in some tasty rat snacks
Still thinks the 80s version was much spookier and scarier.
The evil tentacles of H P Lovecraft seem to be everywhere lately

Three days into our holidays, and the Blond blue eyed aryan rat departed from the day job since last week. Izzie should be a happy happy serpent. But no. It's all doom and gloom.

Had last Thursday and Friday off as usual. It was glorious weather - sunny but not too hot and very breezy but not too windy. Pottered off to the old lunatic asylum with a new devilish deck and also visited the latest instalment of Sculpture by the Sea which is always amazing and magical - especially at sunset
But was unable to enjoy any of it. Was going through the motions but totally unable to be in the present moment. Friday was no better. A visit to see the robotic dinosaurs at the museum followed by another afternoon at the beach amongst the sculptures was equally uninspiring

But this week has been even sadder and more pathetic. Did not even get up until after midday on Monday. Normally would have been up around 5.40 in order to be at work for 7am
Did not leave the Lair until shortly after 2pm to go on a coffee crawl and visit the city. Got the bus back around 5.30pm as there was simply no point in lingering any longer when in such a crazy agitated state

Tuesday was an early bird. Got up reasonably early in order to catch the bus to the city at 9.30am. Was meeting a friend at 11 but there was papers to be read and bills to be paid before then
Went to see "Alice in Wonderland" in 3d before pottering off for pizza and catching the bus home at 4pm. Slinked into the serpent sack for a snooze and did not wake up until just after 6pm.
This is just seriously crazy.

And today was like Monday except not even leaving the house and spending not just the morning but the afternoon too in the Land of Nod.
It's not like there's nothing to do or nowhere to go. There's plenty but just no interest or enthusiasm for anything at all even the stuff we usually love
It's still too hot and dry to bother doing anything new in the garden. All attempts at planting seeds have ended in nothing. Either they dry out with all those 40c plus days or they get eaten by slaters, snails or other little critters
There's also plenty of decluttering, tidying and stuff to be done around the house. Never any shortage of things to do on that front. And there's lots of books to read, dvds to watch and pages to squiggle on. But no interest or enthusiasm at all in doing any of it

We have two days of 38 celsius forecast for Thursday and Friday so not holding out much hope for much motivation on those two days.
What is so strange, often get these phases of doom and gloom, depression and recession but they rarely last long than two weeks. While they usually arrive slowly, they depart suddenly to be followed by a phase of silliness and irrational exuberance. But it's long long overdue by now
All the tricks of going to happy places or doing happy things are not fooling the monsters of gloom. In fact, they seem to be making them more obstinate

There's been a few moments of amusements. Monday evening's gladiatorial battle between Richard Dawkins and Senator Fielding (amongst others) was absolutely riveting and simply hilarious even when it was often rather serious.
Would have just loved if he could have taken on Tony Abbott as well as the Bitch Bishop.

Izzie is busy listening to a most intriguing tale on the radio about the Christian Identity Movement. Oh the joys of being a descendant of the serpent in the Garden of Eden. Not happy at all that these wacko conspiracists are sniffing us out.

But presently feeling rather more like a werewolf than a serpent. Strange that the first five days of the month was such a happy Izzie and then we end up getting a serious case of the grumps for our two days off - Thursday and today. The weather was glorious and there was even a big fat juicy full moon but the serpent was seriously neurotic and cranky
Even managed to stuff up the long anticipated moonrise picnic. Was sitting up at Memorial Hill - one of the few places around here with nearly 360 degree views of the horizon
Had the bottle of red, bread and cheese all ready for the big moment at ten past six. Or so we thought. It's rather cold and windy and very unprotected up there on the top of the hill so Izzie hid in a corner of the memorial reading about none other than the reminiscences of one Remus Lupin about his werewolf days. Was just after 6pm so it was time to come out of the hidie hole where we could get a better view of the horizon. It was then we seen the big red blob. It was half way up on the horizon slightly more to the north than expected. Did get to see it clear the horizon and slowly change to pink then yellow and then white but was still a bit miffed as this should have been the perfect opportunity to catch the moon before it was less than a quarter visible
Next time the Izzie will do a better job of checking. Thursday's official time was actually 18.02. Had got it mixed up with the 17.09 from the previous day. Normally it's at least ten mins after the official time that the critter becomes visible but yesterday just had to be the exception
That's the sort of state the silly serpent was in yesterday to get all in a tizzie about missing five minutes of moonshine. Totally irrational and silly. But trying to reason with demonic possession is pointless. The only thing to do is lie low and hope it will pass.
Never did have the picnic in spite of bringing all those nibblies up the hill. There was simply no point while being in such a stupid neurotic state. And today was not much better. Even a seriously long morning snooze did not work.
Beginning to wonder if there's a pattern as exactly the same sort of irritable crankiness and tiredness just appeared out of nowhere at the last full moon and lasted 3 days or so. But with the difference that there was not even an attempt at a picnic as it was raining all that week. Spent the time snoozing instead.

But in spite of the grumps, was still able to be amused by the observation that apart from Izzie, the only folks up on the hill admiring the beautiful red moon were those walking their dogs.There were lots of very happy dogs up there including one German Shepherd. Most appropriate indeed.
Tomorrow will be back at work. Like the last four weeks, Izzie has every intention to be up early to go to the organic market at City Farm with the happy hippie gorgeous permaculture garden. Will be interesting to see if the serpent ever gets there. Stayed curled up in the serpent basket for every single one of those last four Saturdays despite all those good intentions. Should also manage to get a quick peek in the City museum before pottering off to catch the bus for work at 2pm

This time last year, was not moon watching or slinking in Cyberia but glued to the tube watching the opening ceremony of the Beijing Olympics. Hard to believe it was only a year ago. It sort of seems like centuries. A long gone age of endless possibilities of prosperity.
It was around the time of the full moon last September when the Goblin doom and gloom seriously escalated. Lehmann's turned out not to be too big to fail. Pity that AIG never did get to join them. All those poor merchant bankers jumping off windows. So sad indeed.
Wondering what sort of madness the next full moon will bring.

It's Pity Party time again at the Lair. The Dozens of Dementors and their black bitch dogs are back annoying this serpent.
This time we thinks we've finally sussed out their plans of attack since they don't seem to have the imagination to indulge in variety
So it's simply a case of just lying low and waiting until they get bored and then finally getting back to more mundane muggle matters
It's interesting just how often their attacks include inflicting their rasping rattling croaking voices and clammy sticky hands on this particular victim. So much so that the Izzie requested respite from House Elf duties for today and tomorrow. That also means the end of the original plans to get all greened up and go drowning the shamrock over at Petunia's place. Not wanting to be bringing our bad bugs over there

Did manage to score a minor victory over the dreaded beasties the other day. Missed the morning bus by less than a minute on Friday. Normally that would have been just the occasion to indulge in a fit of hissing and Myrtlish moaning about being so utterly useless and stupid and pathetic and other such drama. Instead - drowned out the inner voice. After all, it was Black Friday after all and the serpent was due to deliver a 4 minute speech on the topic of "Black" The serpent's reputation for wickedness was on the line so an extra effort at attendance was called for. So instead of slinking off sulking, pottered off to the duck pond to watch the big juicy moon in the west while waiting for the next bus at 6.50. Would most likely arrive about 7.20 - five minutes after the official start of the meeting. But it was either that or miss the whole thing
Is funny - when the situation seems hopeless - being very late or being ridiculously short staffed at work - that's when things often work out much better than expected. Maybe that's just because you just do what you can rather than panicking and rushing which is infinitely more exhausting and less productive

Was also not particularly well prepared. Three cards each from two different card decks the day before was not very inspiring. Strange that the Emperor turned up twice. That made Izzie think of nasty old Nero. But not being a Latin nut - decided that the black dog by his side in one of the cards had more potential
So basically started with our adventures that morning with the bus and the decision to turn up and delay the pity parties for another day along with other observations about dealing with doom and gloom

Izzie was most delighted when the critic said he was impressed with how we managed to make the topic of depression funny but while at the same time taking it seriously and not being dismissive. He told the serpent never to lose her trait of crazy quirkiness which is almost a trademark by now.

It is truly a strange thing to retain the tiniest flicker of impartial Martian objectivity while immersed in the middle of misery. It's the only thing that keeps the beasts on their leash
Especially amusing then when Uncle Vernon declares that Izzie ought to do something and get medication when he is infinitely more extreme on the bipolar roller coaster ride. Petunia's always telling him that he has to get something done for his dementor problem but of course he does not have a problem. It is everyone else who has got the problem. So it's a bit mean and sneaky for this serpent to come out of the broom cupboard and admit to the strange pets that we are keeping, when his broom cupboard is infinitely bigger and he's keeping a whole menagerie of monsters in there.
Well, it's time to be raiding the bars of Lindt in the Larder and scrubbing the scales in the shower tub
Still not decided whether to stay slinking about here and sulking - really should be decluttering and eying up items on that list or to potter off downtown on a coffee crawl.