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izmeinaIzzie got a most unexpected phone call from Petunia on Tuesday. Vernon has decided on the spur of the moment to go off to England this Friday at 11.20 am. A bit shocked and surprized is Izzie at this impulsiveness. Especially as Iz is rostered on as the Chairwoman of our 7am Friday morning meetings and it is WAY too late to get a replacement.
After a quick perusal of the floo network and other transportation options, I figure that I can go to my meeting and be able to get back to Number 4 by 9am. (In the past there would have been sulking, pity parties and whatnot and not much lateral thinking at all)
Iz figures that since we won't see him again until October or so..really should pop over to stay on Wednesday night instead of staying home tidying up my sock drawers or drooling over the Preciousssss.
Izzie turns up to discover that the Masons have been invited to dinner. Izzie can join them but declines as I feel somewhat queazy. (The perfect opportunity for an uninterrupted visit to Cyberia) After a while I do decide to be sociable and to join them.
Somehow strangely the subject turns to THAT POTTER BOY. The usual sneers of disgust, revulsion...talk of gullible creatures and manipulative multinational marketing conspiracies.... Izzie proudly proclaimed to have been outside the bookstores at 7am to buy her copy of the Preciousssss. They look at me in total disbelief and disgust. But how do you explain to folks who believe that the world was created in seven days, and all sorts of slander and innuendo about evil serpentsssss? And how could you even begin to explain that you do not feel hungry because a couple of LINES in this infantile immature pathetic excuse for a book have made you feel quite queasy and sick?
Well...this morning Iz arrives at the meeting and takes the chair with a most evil chuckle. This is a public speaking club that meets every Friday at 7 am and we do speeches, meeting procedures, word of the day and worstest of all CHAIRING meetings. We all take turns and this time it was Iz in the hot seat. We also have a critic who gives constructive suggestions and sometimes Malfoy-like impersonations of our performance or lack of it.
I do not have my green hat and scarf today and unfortunately do NOT have any pink ribbons in my possession but Iz does have a rather large goosefeather QUILL.
After a brief introduction by the President, Iz proceeds to open the meeting.
"Hem. Hem. I now open Club 8 meeting number 355.....blah blah... allow me to introduce...blah blah...Hem Hem....Standards have been slipping in this club. It is my duty to put an end to this appalling situation. To introduce 'a new era of openness, effectiveness and accountability,..intent on preserving what ought to be preserved, perfecting what needs to be perfected and pruning wherever we find practices that ought to be prohibited.'
Izzie smirks and asks "Now where do you think I got that from? "
Tony our resident bean counter... a qualified one - not like wannabee Izzie interrupts...
"Oh for God's sake are you going to read us the whole handbook of accounting standards or what?"
Iz brandishes her quill and says. Hem Hem. "Well it isn't the CPA handbook. And any more misbehaviour and there will be LINES to be written."
After an astonishing episode of meeting procedure with not a single amendment or procedural motion or the usual nasties sent to test the occupant of the hot seat.. we finally got to the main topic of the day.. the great balloon debate.
Three people are in a balloon which is rapidly losing altitude and will surely crash unless two of the occupants are thrown overboard. Our three occupants George W Bush, Tony Blair and John W Howard must convince the audience of their worthiness as it is the audience who get to VOTE for who is saved.
As Izzie says.. the bad news is we have to save ONE of them.
After 3 most amusing and entertaining 5 minute speeches it is time to vote.
Izzie twirls the quill and announces. "Before you make your decision, I would just like to remind you of Ministerial Decree No 27 signed yesterday by the Senate which allows for any voter who makes a decision (or belongs to an organization) not approved by the Prime Minister to be detained for seven days without any legal requirement to inform their families and to be questioned by ME three times for a period not exceeding 8 consecutive hours"
(Unfortunate but true.....looks like it is not just children that have been reading the latest Harry Potter. Since 11 September 2001, it is just one deja vu experience after another)
After a convincing win by the Prime Miniature who got 50% of the vote I asked if anyone had noticed my abstention. I smirked "I cast my vote for Lord Sauron"
Vernon was asking about the meeting on the way to the airport. "Strange how you can get up at 5.30 for that but when you are at our place you stay in bed until 10 -11 am."
"Oh but that is where I go to recharge my batteries for the week." He replies.. "Er..... so is it true that the rest of them are as wierd as you?"
(Izzie knows for a fact that they are a bunch of Ringwraiths, Trekkies and Potterholics and at least one of the members present is already acquainted with the delightful Dolores.)
PS...... and if ickle Izzie should suddenly disapparate without trace.....you will know what has happened.
After a quick perusal of the floo network and other transportation options, I figure that I can go to my meeting and be able to get back to Number 4 by 9am. (In the past there would have been sulking, pity parties and whatnot and not much lateral thinking at all)
Iz figures that since we won't see him again until October or so..really should pop over to stay on Wednesday night instead of staying home tidying up my sock drawers or drooling over the Preciousssss.
Izzie turns up to discover that the Masons have been invited to dinner. Izzie can join them but declines as I feel somewhat queazy. (The perfect opportunity for an uninterrupted visit to Cyberia) After a while I do decide to be sociable and to join them.
Somehow strangely the subject turns to THAT POTTER BOY. The usual sneers of disgust, revulsion...talk of gullible creatures and manipulative multinational marketing conspiracies.... Izzie proudly proclaimed to have been outside the bookstores at 7am to buy her copy of the Preciousssss. They look at me in total disbelief and disgust. But how do you explain to folks who believe that the world was created in seven days, and all sorts of slander and innuendo about evil serpentsssss? And how could you even begin to explain that you do not feel hungry because a couple of LINES in this infantile immature pathetic excuse for a book have made you feel quite queasy and sick?
Well...this morning Iz arrives at the meeting and takes the chair with a most evil chuckle. This is a public speaking club that meets every Friday at 7 am and we do speeches, meeting procedures, word of the day and worstest of all CHAIRING meetings. We all take turns and this time it was Iz in the hot seat. We also have a critic who gives constructive suggestions and sometimes Malfoy-like impersonations of our performance or lack of it.
I do not have my green hat and scarf today and unfortunately do NOT have any pink ribbons in my possession but Iz does have a rather large goosefeather QUILL.
After a brief introduction by the President, Iz proceeds to open the meeting.
"Hem. Hem. I now open Club 8 meeting number 355.....blah blah... allow me to introduce...blah blah...Hem Hem....Standards have been slipping in this club. It is my duty to put an end to this appalling situation. To introduce 'a new era of openness, effectiveness and accountability,..intent on preserving what ought to be preserved, perfecting what needs to be perfected and pruning wherever we find practices that ought to be prohibited.'
Izzie smirks and asks "Now where do you think I got that from? "
Tony our resident bean counter... a qualified one - not like wannabee Izzie interrupts...
"Oh for God's sake are you going to read us the whole handbook of accounting standards or what?"
Iz brandishes her quill and says. Hem Hem. "Well it isn't the CPA handbook. And any more misbehaviour and there will be LINES to be written."
After an astonishing episode of meeting procedure with not a single amendment or procedural motion or the usual nasties sent to test the occupant of the hot seat.. we finally got to the main topic of the day.. the great balloon debate.
Three people are in a balloon which is rapidly losing altitude and will surely crash unless two of the occupants are thrown overboard. Our three occupants George W Bush, Tony Blair and John W Howard must convince the audience of their worthiness as it is the audience who get to VOTE for who is saved.
As Izzie says.. the bad news is we have to save ONE of them.
After 3 most amusing and entertaining 5 minute speeches it is time to vote.
Izzie twirls the quill and announces. "Before you make your decision, I would just like to remind you of Ministerial Decree No 27 signed yesterday by the Senate which allows for any voter who makes a decision (or belongs to an organization) not approved by the Prime Minister to be detained for seven days without any legal requirement to inform their families and to be questioned by ME three times for a period not exceeding 8 consecutive hours"
(Unfortunate but true.....looks like it is not just children that have been reading the latest Harry Potter. Since 11 September 2001, it is just one deja vu experience after another)
After a convincing win by the Prime Miniature who got 50% of the vote I asked if anyone had noticed my abstention. I smirked "I cast my vote for Lord Sauron"
Vernon was asking about the meeting on the way to the airport. "Strange how you can get up at 5.30 for that but when you are at our place you stay in bed until 10 -11 am."
"Oh but that is where I go to recharge my batteries for the week." He replies.. "Er..... so is it true that the rest of them are as wierd as you?"
(Izzie knows for a fact that they are a bunch of Ringwraiths, Trekkies and Potterholics and at least one of the members present is already acquainted with the delightful Dolores.)
PS...... and if ickle Izzie should suddenly disapparate without trace.....you will know what has happened.
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no subject
Date: 2003-06-27 12:58 pm (UTC)That should piss off the religious nutters....
Hem Hem.
Date: 2003-06-28 09:14 am (UTC)In those dark days before I had seen the green light and had not set my eyes on the Potter boy...but was ever so interested... my fairy Godmother in Durmieland, tells me when I phoned her about how disappointing the movie was. She adds... well at least they left in the line "There is no good and evil.....only power and those too weak to seek it"
Iz thinks...I must read the books.. RIGHT NOW.. anyone who can write such a wonderful line like that cannot be ignored for one minute longer.
And this whole book can be pretty much summed up by that one line. And that one reason among many why Izzie absolutely adores it.
Re: Hem Hem.
Date: 2003-06-28 10:29 am (UTC)1. Parents in Erised.
2. Sirius thinking he's going to be free in POA.
3. Neville's mum. That really got me.
4. Luna putting up the list.
Those were the ones I can think of that were closest to making me cry....
For some reason, Harry's reaction to the death didn't strike me as particularly emotional - I don't think it was the best piece of writing.
As for ideas, Book 5 is short on them, like Book 2. Well, except political ideas....and fascism. I like the parody of fascist squads.
Must analyse the best-written scenes now....