The Lair of the Emerald Serpent

Today it was time to indulge in some serious nostalgia. Not just a visit to my favourite lunatic asylum but also a sneak peek at the work in progress that is Sculptures by the Sea which officially opens this Friday.

Then there was also the matter of decadent indulgence. Back in December 2014, New Edition book shop was filled with an assortment of gorgeous tomes all out in time for the Christmas craziness.

Including this one




The walls are adorned with promotional pictures from China Mieville’s “Kraken” which must be a good 5 years old by now but is the perfect theme for a book store located in the university quarter of Fremantle and less than 5 minutes walk to the Indian Ocean.
It was while flicking through this book that I had the idea - “What if New Edition were really a recruitment centre for an ancient Kraken cult?” and figured this would be fun idea for a possible plot for next November. And never mind just the book store - the whole town could be in on the scheme. The following 12 months provided an abundance of circumstantial evidence in the form of street art and assorted graffiti.

Of course the inner serpent would have none of this nonsense. There is only one true faith and that is the Church of Serpentology and NO you do not need this infernal tome or any other for research purposes. Not just because you already have several paperbacks with most of the stories and they are all online these days anyway. But this book is a ridiculous $49.99, it weighs a ton, is suitable only for a rather large coffee table and anyway you could probably get it online for half the price. But most importantly of all - you do not NEED it and you cannot justify wasting precious pennies on such decadence when the book shop is filled with endless rows of interesting and useful books.

So reason and logic prevailed. That was until the evening of a big Nanowrimo write in. There was a table full of books and mysterious envelopes as prizes. I picked the one from New Edition. It was worth 30 silver sickles with a use by date of NEVER unlike most vouchers which are valid for between 6 and 12 months.
Now this was the perfect excuse for some decadent indulgence. The summer solstice seemed the most auspicious time to snaffle the Squid. Problem was that it was not there. After all, the book was published in November 2014 and was not going to be hanging around taking up precious space on the shelves waiting for Izzie to win the lottery. There were also many other gorgeous books on the shelves worthy of serpent attention including the Thing Explainer (complicated stuff in simple words)

No harm in asking. They said they would have it back in stock in mid January and today was the first day since then that I have darkened the doors of the store. Once again I could not find it in the Sci fi and Cult fiction section so asked at the counter and one of the book sellers came back with the big black tentacled tome within the minute. It turns out that it was in the classics section along with the complete works of Edgar Allan Poe, the Annotated Alice, Annotated Brothers Grimm and an assortment of other enormous, gorgeous and very expensive books.

So I handed over the gift voucher and 20 silver sickles and took possession of the Tentacled Tome. From there I made my way to the new arts centre (and old lunatic asylum) and sat in the gorgeous courtyard browsing through the pages and all the pretty pictures until it was closing time. Then I was off to catch the bus to see the sculptures by the sea.
So inspired by the monstrous abominations on the pages, an assortment of strange sculptures on the sea shore shining and glowing in the spooky light of the setting sun, it was a gorgeous way to end the day.


Back in the real world there are soul sucking vampires, weasels, werewolves, zombie prime ministers and other evil monsters lurking and snivelling and indulging in their usual arse covering, back stabbing, cost cutting goblin ways but the dreadful recent resurrections of Tony Abbott and John Howard, the triumphs of Trump and the simpering sniveling litany of excuses spouted by Goblin George Pell are best left for another day.

They are where the true incarnations of horror and cosmic monstrosity can be found.

Only 9 more nights of watching Orion and the Southern Cross before enduring an Etihad Enhanced Economy flight to the wintry side of the world.

Maybe the stars will align before then. Since the serpent has only 9 days to use the monthly allowance of 4GB that means being able to indulge in a decadent feast of Cthulhumas Carols without any worry about nasty excess charges like happened last December solstice when I got a bit carried away with the offerings of the Dagon Tabernacle Choir, the HPL Historical Society and others of their ilk.




Will most certainly NOT be able to indulge in such perverted decadence on the other side. Well at least not in company. It would simply be in the worst possible taste.

What better way to spend the darkest days than indulging in a monsterfest? But there’s so little time and so many to choose.
The museum mummies were already scheduled for 6pm on Friday at the State Library.

Thursday was a gorgeous sunny day so it seemed a shame to spend the precious hours of daylight indoors just to get the cheapskate before 5pm rates. Had the inspired idea of using the free movie club members ticket to go after dark.
So it was a choice between Monsters University and World War Z. The zombies lost that round. This was not helped by looking at the trailer and thinking that it looked suspiciously like yet another silly action adventure saga. And why where they hiding the zombies when they are supposed to be the stars of the show?

Monsters University was one of those happy ending tales where the underdog wins through sheer perseverance and hard work rather than an abundance of talent. But it was fun to feast the Izzie eyes on all the adorable creatures - especially slinky and sneaky Randall. He so deserves his own series.

Friday was time to visit the museum. Did not go to see the real mummies in the presently running “Secrets of the Afterlife” exhibition. Once again the weather was simply too gorgeous to be wasted indoors.

The creature feature at 6pm was on the topic of mummies as portrayed in the movies, cartoons, television and assorted media.

The speaker introduced the topic and took the opportunity to promote her other work concerning the Marquis de Sade in the movies, 9/11 and the rise of torture porn and similar squeamish stuff

It was such a pity that she had to mutilate such fascinating material with endless rabbiting on about Marxist and feminist theory, Freudian analysis, dialectical materialism and the post modern cultural studies mob favourite buzzword of all ‘interrogating the text’

( More monsters )

Last Thursday was a glorious crisp and crunchy sunny spring day. Not too hot and not too cold. A veritable Goldilocks day. It was perfect weather for a picnic in the park at the top end of town. But that particular activity was already scheduled for the very next day.

Thursday evening would be spent at a discussion group on the topic of “What makes us tick”. So it made sense to find some place to lurk near the bus route. The first visit to the group’s new meeting venue way back in May had made it quite obvious that this was not a place to linger any longer than necessary. It too had been a beautiful sunny day but a bit crisper and colder than at this time of year. But being unsure of exactly where the new meeting place was and how long the bus took to get there, decided to make a day of it rather than just timing it to turn up an hour or so before the 6.30pm start

It took a week to recover a visit to the hell hole that is the Galleria shopping centre. Izzie hates large shopping complexes at the best of times but this place is just so enormous, so noisy and crowded and infested with rug rats and squealing rampaging beasties.

The group used to meet in a cafe right next to the train line in a pretty old suburb with lots of spooky little streets and interesting locations to lurk. Was most peeved indeed when they changed their opening hours to match the rest of the nanny cafes in the area meaning that the venue was no longer suitable for long and rambling discussions about life, the universe and everything.
So the grand plan was to lurk in a lovely old bit of the city and to catch the bus around 4pm in order to avoid the worst of the rush hour traffic. It would also be an opportunity to find some interesting locations for lunch.

Been trying out various cheap and cheerful Asian restaurants in the search for kosher cuisine suitable for vegetarian serpents. Figured it was time to broaden the horizons beyond dahl and basmati rice.
Chinese vegetarian food is generally bland. The only spice option seems to be chili and more chili. Malaysian and Indonesian seem to have the best of both worlds with both a Chinese and Indian influence along with one marvelous magical ingredient - satay sauce.

Found a pretty poky but seriously cheap and cheerful Indonesian joint on the north side of town. The owner is very friendly and the food is cheap but decent. In spite of the low prices it is not your average greasy spoon. It also happens to be a short walk away from a gorgeous little cafe on Lincoln Street overlooking a spooky art deco cooling tower.

Izzie likes the quiet quirky places that are just off the beaten track and these two are little gems. It is also wonderful to walk along the side streets looking at the gorgeous old houses and gardens.

( slinking and snooping )